r/shitposting Nov 27 '21 Silver 3 Helpful 4 Wholesome 3

Google, more like should go die in a hole- gle WARNING: BRAIN DAMAGE

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17.7k Upvotes

u/QualityVote Nov 27 '21

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796

u/galaticB00M12 Nov 27 '21

Stupid “A” looking headass woman and her stupid corporate art style

166

u/casualboireddit Nov 27 '21

mogus 📮📮

66

u/DomTrapGFurryLolicon Nov 27 '21

It's about trying to make boring people look quirky

49

u/Curious-Astronaut235 Nov 27 '21

It's about drive

47

u/rjuez00 Nov 27 '21

its about power

36

u/waffles1273 Nov 27 '21

we stay hungry

33

u/yeuhbru Nov 27 '21

We devour

27

u/ShankboltoUwU Nov 27 '21

Put in the work

29

u/airfryerburger Nov 27 '21

Put in the hour

25

u/Comfortable_Ad6063 Nov 27 '21

And take what's ours.

16

u/Comfortable_Ad6063 Nov 27 '21

Black and Samoan in my veins.

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7

u/[deleted] Nov 27 '21

stupid small organs woman

6

u/[deleted] Nov 27 '21

[removed] — view removed comment

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464

u/SyllabicFir Nov 27 '21

hate these new corporate art styles they’re everywhere now

127

u/Routine_Ad_7402 Nov 27 '21

The only art style that actually works is kurtsgesagt’s style

70

u/Extreme-Fee Nov 27 '21

That’s because they care about if it looks good or not. Corporations don’t.

32

u/tunayee Nov 27 '21

Kurzgesagt*

10

u/shruggletuggle Nov 27 '21

Kurzgegagatgzgiejebjsjsyehns

5

u/SuperMaxx2020 Nov 27 '21

Does anyone know how to actually spell it correctly off the top of there head except this guy?

5

u/islandgoober Nov 28 '21

G*rmans do. 🤮

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8

u/Routine_Ad_7402 Nov 27 '21

Yeah, i was too lazy to check

12

u/MazoTanto Nov 27 '21

krukemdosnfiendhsnsdk*

4

u/MazoTanto Nov 27 '21

now dont take this seriously

2

u/Little_DimbXD Nov 27 '21

Ich wenn deutsch

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643

u/TheBeanOffical Nov 27 '21

google and their terrible overused "modern" art styles 😡

87

u/MtNowhere Nov 27 '21

35

u/Not-a-master69 Nov 27 '21

The irony of this being a google search 💀

44

u/TimAllensCokeGuy Nov 27 '21

HELLO GOOGLE FI. A PHONE PLAN THAT CAN

19

u/Joe_says_no Nov 27 '21

IT DOESNT FUCKING RHYME YOU DUMB BITCH

13

u/MrBoB511 Nov 27 '21

I KNOW I FUCKING HATE THIS SONG

THE LYRICS ARE LOPSIDED AND DON’T RHYME AND OFTEN CRAM TOO MANY WORDS INTO ONE LINE

5

u/killmeplsdude Nov 27 '21

That rhymes

3

u/skeletor69420 Nov 27 '21

They are so infuriating

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13

u/Borrelli27 Nov 27 '21

I hate you for writing this

6

u/muscovyduckmaster Nov 27 '21

Everywhere I go. I hear that voice.

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13

u/biden_bot75 Nov 27 '21

Kroger has minion people on all their ads and I hate it

2

u/chicken_nugget779 Nov 27 '21

kroger ads infuriate me for some reason

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341

u/Random_hootowl000 Nov 27 '21

ME FUCKING TOO HOLY

74

u/Flippyrex Nov 27 '21

PRAISE THE LORD!

Can i get an amen?

20

u/catfoodfood Nov 27 '21

PRAISE THE LORD!

AND PASS THE AMMUNITION

17

u/Negative-Delta Nov 27 '21

ave satanus

9

u/Tacitus_Kilgore85 Nov 27 '21

Ave, true to Caesar!

14

u/concretebeats Nov 27 '21

Nomine Cthulhu

2

u/[deleted] Nov 27 '21

[removed] — view removed comment

13

u/AutoModerator Nov 27 '21

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-6

u/laughingabouttorture Nov 27 '21

Hail Satan ! Archangelo !!!!!!

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2

u/ImmaSlapDat Nov 27 '21

I'll do you one better HALLELUJAH!!!

103

u/IWatchPeopleSleep Nov 27 '21

And it’s always got that stupid fucking trumpet accompanying it as well, at least there in Australia it does and it’s fucking horrible

31

u/SomeStupidPerson Nov 27 '21

Just listening to those ads makes me lose braincells. Every single version that plays is fucking awful to listen to.

Google really goes and makes sure they make the worst ads just to fuck with people

2

u/IWatchPeopleSleep Nov 27 '21

All I hear when these fucking ads come on is just burh burh bruh bruh burh burh buuuuuuu it’s about the size of you

1

u/TheSoftwareNerd Nov 27 '21

I have them stuck in my head, thanks to Gloserle

208

u/[deleted] Nov 27 '21 edited Dec 13 '21

[deleted]

112

u/NottOnMyScreen Nov 27 '21

I thought it was called trash

6

u/random_clonetrooper Nov 27 '21

What's the difference?

24

u/Apprentice_of_Lain Nov 27 '21

I thought it was called "Alagria" ot smth?

19

u/RunAwayInCircles shitposting>>>>>>196 Nov 27 '21

What you're talking about is in the article too, read it

7

u/RunAwayInCircles shitposting>>>>>>196 Nov 27 '21

What you're talking about is in the article too, read it

4

u/CafeZach Nov 27 '21

Alegria is the facebook name for it

11

u/BackwardsSnake Nov 27 '21

I've heard it called "corporate Memphis"

13

u/katyfail Nov 27 '21

“Homo” just means “man” (or “human”/“person”, as in “homo sapiens”) and “globo” means “globe”.

So “globe person”. It’s not really a joke, it’s a pretty accurate description of the style.

17

u/____-__________-____ Nov 27 '21

According to the article it's a portmanteau of "global" and "homogenization"

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2

u/Murky_Effect3914 Nov 27 '21

Homo can also mean same, like homosexual, homogenous, etc. Well, I don’t know what it means EXACTLY, but it’s probably something like “same”. Ah, in this case it most likely isn’t referring to that, just thought to add this info.

7

u/JonnySnowflake Nov 27 '21

The fun and confusing thing is, homo is Latin for man and Greek for same

4

u/aHOMELESSkrill Nov 27 '21

Well as a word itself Homo means man (Homo Sapiens) but at a prefix to a word it means same (homogeneous)

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60

u/finn_the_fruity Nov 27 '21

Once a my friend wrote, "Google Fi, a phone plan that can," on the board. You'll never guess his name 🗿

16

u/BraianP Nov 27 '21

Google fi, a phone plan that can help you get out of the internet for free (this is all from my autocomplete)

8

u/juicy_harambe Nov 27 '21

Google fi is a good thing for you, king. (Made using autocomplete on my pixel 6)

3

u/BraianP Nov 27 '21

Damn they be trying to rail you in with praise

3

u/Arvindjor Nov 27 '21

Google fi the same time as the board of directors and officers and I have to go to the Europa League of legends of awesomeness of the characters.

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2

u/finn_the_fruity Nov 27 '21

It actually only draws you in father. And father. And farther.

2

u/shruggletuggle Nov 27 '21

Google Fi, a phone plan that can help me with the gang

I guess im part of a gang now, nice

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48

u/EeeYeeReEe Nov 27 '21

“Art” style

38

u/laughingabouttorture Nov 27 '21

I don't mind the color palette but WHY THE FUCK ARE THOSE HUMANS SO CHEWING-GUM LIKE AND WHAT IS IT WITH THE LONG LEGS AND SMALL HEAD ?!?! Plus, the drawings are so goddamn flat it is so disappointing. I should have submitted my own art.

6

u/throwaway_afterusage Nov 27 '21

maybe it's flat on purpose. but i agree, the colour palette is great, everything else...

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25

u/I-smell-eggs-slmmmgh Nov 27 '21

Damn that’s a pretty violent roast

22

u/DeadPlecostomus Nov 27 '21 edited Nov 27 '21

Her legs and arms make up more than 70% of her body

17

u/1plus1equalsgender Nov 27 '21

The "music" is far worse

14

u/Browsingsomememes Nov 27 '21

Koala

43

u/AutoModerator Nov 27 '21

Koalas are fucking horrible animals. They have one of the smallest brain to body ratios of any mammal, additionally - their brains are smooth. A brain is folded to increase the surface area for neurons. If you present a koala with leaves plucked from a branch, laid on a flat surface, the koala will not recognise it as food. They are too thick to adapt their feeding behaviour to cope with change. In a room full of potential food, they can literally starve to death. This is not the token of an animal that is winning at life. Speaking of stupidity and food, one of the likely reasons for their primitive brains is the fact that additionally to being poisonous, eucalyptus leaves (the only thing they eat) have almost no nutritional value. They can't afford the extra energy to think, they sleep more than 80% of their fucking lives. When they are awake all they do is eat, shit and occasionally scream like fucking satan. Because eucalyptus leaves hold such little nutritional value, koalas have to ferment the leaves in their guts for days on end. Unlike their brains, they have the largest hind gut to body ratio of any mammal. Many herbivorous mammals have adaptations to cope with harsh plant life taking its toll on their teeth, rodents for instance have teeth that never stop growing, some animals only have teeth on their lower jaw, grinding plant matter on bony plates in the tops of their mouths, others have enlarged molars that distribute the wear and break down plant matter more efficiently... Koalas are no exception, when their teeth erode down to nothing, they resolve the situation by starving to death, because they're fucking terrible animals. Being mammals, koalas raise their joeys on milk (admittedly, one of the lowest milk yields to body ratio... There's a trend here). When the young joey needs to transition from rich, nourishing substances like milk, to eucalyptus (a plant that seems to be making it abundantly clear that it doesn't want to be eaten), it finds it does not have the necessary gut flora to digest the leaves. To remedy this, the young joey begins nuzzling its mother's anus until she leaks a little diarrhoea (actually fecal pap, slightly less digested), which he then proceeds to slurp on. This partially digested plant matter gives him just what he needs to start developing his digestive system. Of course, he may not even have needed to bother nuzzling his mother. She may have been suffering from incontinence. Why? Because koalas are riddled with chlamydia. In some areas the infection rate is 80% or higher. This statistic isn't helped by the fact that one of the few other activities koalas will spend their precious energy on is rape. Despite being seasonal breeders, males seem to either not know or care, and will simply overpower a female regardless of whether she is ovulating. If she fights back, he may drag them both out of the tree, which brings us full circle back to the brain: Koalas have a higher than average quantity of cerebrospinal fluid in their brains. This is to protect their brains from injury... should they fall from a tree. An animal so thick it has its own little built in special ed helmet. I fucking hate them.

Tldr; Koalas are stupid, leaky, STI riddled sex offenders. But, hey. They look cute. If you ignore the terrifying snake eyes and terrifying feet.

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12

u/joemamaoftheancients Nov 27 '21

fock koala all my homies hate koala

3

u/SuperRexT Nov 27 '21

koala

3

u/AutoModerator Nov 27 '21

Koalas are fucking horrible animals. They have one of the smallest brain to body ratios of any mammal, additionally - their brains are smooth. A brain is folded to increase the surface area for neurons. If you present a koala with leaves plucked from a branch, laid on a flat surface, the koala will not recognise it as food. They are too thick to adapt their feeding behaviour to cope with change. In a room full of potential food, they can literally starve to death. This is not the token of an animal that is winning at life. Speaking of stupidity and food, one of the likely reasons for their primitive brains is the fact that additionally to being poisonous, eucalyptus leaves (the only thing they eat) have almost no nutritional value. They can't afford the extra energy to think, they sleep more than 80% of their fucking lives. When they are awake all they do is eat, shit and occasionally scream like fucking satan. Because eucalyptus leaves hold such little nutritional value, koalas have to ferment the leaves in their guts for days on end. Unlike their brains, they have the largest hind gut to body ratio of any mammal. Many herbivorous mammals have adaptations to cope with harsh plant life taking its toll on their teeth, rodents for instance have teeth that never stop growing, some animals only have teeth on their lower jaw, grinding plant matter on bony plates in the tops of their mouths, others have enlarged molars that distribute the wear and break down plant matter more efficiently... Koalas are no exception, when their teeth erode down to nothing, they resolve the situation by starving to death, because they're fucking terrible animals. Being mammals, koalas raise their joeys on milk (admittedly, one of the lowest milk yields to body ratio... There's a trend here). When the young joey needs to transition from rich, nourishing substances like milk, to eucalyptus (a plant that seems to be making it abundantly clear that it doesn't want to be eaten), it finds it does not have the necessary gut flora to digest the leaves. To remedy this, the young joey begins nuzzling its mother's anus until she leaks a little diarrhoea (actually fecal pap, slightly less digested), which he then proceeds to slurp on. This partially digested plant matter gives him just what he needs to start developing his digestive system. Of course, he may not even have needed to bother nuzzling his mother. She may have been suffering from incontinence. Why? Because koalas are riddled with chlamydia. In some areas the infection rate is 80% or higher. This statistic isn't helped by the fact that one of the few other activities koalas will spend their precious energy on is rape. Despite being seasonal breeders, males seem to either not know or care, and will simply overpower a female regardless of whether she is ovulating. If she fights back, he may drag them both out of the tree, which brings us full circle back to the brain: Koalas have a higher than average quantity of cerebrospinal fluid in their brains. This is to protect their brains from injury... should they fall from a tree. An animal so thick it has its own little built in special ed helmet. I fucking hate them.

Tldr; Koalas are stupid, leaky, STI riddled sex offenders. But, hey. They look cute. If you ignore the terrifying snake eyes and terrifying feet.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

4

u/SuperRexT Nov 27 '21

belgium, 1984, based, taiwan, koala, fuck kevin, NFT

2

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Dude I own this NFT. Do you really think that you can get away with theft when you’re showing what you stole from me directly to my face? My lawyer will make an easy job of this case. Prepare to say goodbye to your luscious life and start preparing for the streets. I will ruin you.

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Daily Kevin Fact #24:

Kevin has better things to do with his life than have sex with you.

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u/AutoModerator Nov 27 '21

Watch your language!

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u/[deleted] Nov 27 '21

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11

u/AutoModerator Nov 27 '21

Based? Based on what? On your dick? Please shut the fuck up and use words properly you fuckin troglodyte, do you think God gave us a freedom of speech just to spew random words that have no meaning that doesn't even correllate to the topic of the conversation? Like please you always complain about why no one talks to you or no one expresses their opinions on you because you're always spewing random shit like poggers based cringe and when you try to explain what it is and you just say that it's funny like what? What the fuck is funny about that do you think you'll just become a stand-up comedian that will get a standing ovation just because you said "cum" in the stage? HELL NO YOU FUCKIN IDIOT, so please shut the fuck up and use words properly.

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6

u/SupahSpankeh Nov 27 '21

This may just be my favourite bot ever.

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14

u/xXx_megaSwag_xXx Nov 27 '21

it reflects everything wrong with today's corporate culture

12

u/theswedishsnake163 Nov 27 '21

The bodies are so disproportionate. It looks awful.

10

u/horiami Nov 27 '21

people look totemically ugly and deformed

12

u/nucular_mastermind Nov 27 '21

It's called ALEGRIA and yes, it's awful.

I really enjoy the rendering in this style of Saturn devouring his children though!

6

u/Disastrous_World8491 Nov 27 '21

That painting is fuckin’ horrifying ngl

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8

u/Flyheight- Nov 27 '21

I hate everything about those Google Fi ads. Epically the songs and art styles.

19

u/slaughtrr12 Nov 27 '21

The “don’t know how to draw humans anatomically correct” art style

18

u/Ins0litude Nov 27 '21

The "we dont want to offend anyone and be cancelled" "art" style

6

u/shruggletuggle Nov 27 '21

Its my personal goal to offend as many "people" as possible

6

u/fourehead Nov 27 '21

This shit is fucking trash

4

u/Dismal-Car-8360 Nov 27 '21

And the lyrics that are just crap.

4

u/Rinroar Nov 27 '21

Off topic but the phone ad where they're at the fucking beach at the song goes "say goodbye to not having wifi when you need it" bitch you're at the beach why tf you need your phone

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4

u/Giancraft1912 Nov 27 '21

fucking shit of art style even rule 34 artist of your mom has cooler art

11

u/RoyaleJulie Nov 27 '21

YES FINALLY-

My art teacher (years ago) once gave me a preference picture of THIS STYLE while I was trying to draw a anime styled strawberry ELF. SHE TOLD ME TO DRAW A STRAWBERRY ELF IN THIS UGLY STYLE-

7

u/AdrianTheRo Nov 27 '21

I bet Hitler painted something like that when he failed art school

4

u/AZ-Cotton Nov 27 '21

Apparently he couldn't draw people. Perfect match with this style.

2

u/Handlomeister Nov 27 '21

definitly no

3

u/elitist-cock-pirate Nov 27 '21

Google Fi? More like Google die 😈

3

u/Foppop21 Nov 27 '21

FUCK I forgot about that stuff

It’s so FUCKING FAKE FUCK GOOGLE FUCK FUCKING FUCKITY FUCKER ALL FUCK

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3

u/oopsImScorpio Nov 27 '21 edited Nov 27 '21

One day one of gods angels descended from heaven, took a dump in front of everyone and called it "a gift from the lord above" as punishment for the sins we have committed. Since that day humanity is plagued by the gruesome abomination of what we call corporate art.

2

u/Chilifille Nov 27 '21

It's corporate af, and it also reminds me of the art style in my old school textbooks, which makes it even worse.

3

u/Browsingsomememes Nov 27 '21

Koalas

0

u/AutoModerator Nov 27 '21

Koalas are fucking horrible animals. They have one of the smallest brain to body ratios of any mammal, additionally - their brains are smooth. A brain is folded to increase the surface area for neurons. If you present a koala with leaves plucked from a branch, laid on a flat surface, the koala will not recognise it as food. They are too thick to adapt their feeding behaviour to cope with change. In a room full of potential food, they can literally starve to death. This is not the token of an animal that is winning at life. Speaking of stupidity and food, one of the likely reasons for their primitive brains is the fact that additionally to being poisonous, eucalyptus leaves (the only thing they eat) have almost no nutritional value. They can't afford the extra energy to think, they sleep more than 80% of their fucking lives. When they are awake all they do is eat, shit and occasionally scream like fucking satan. Because eucalyptus leaves hold such little nutritional value, koalas have to ferment the leaves in their guts for days on end. Unlike their brains, they have the largest hind gut to body ratio of any mammal. Many herbivorous mammals have adaptations to cope with harsh plant life taking its toll on their teeth, rodents for instance have teeth that never stop growing, some animals only have teeth on their lower jaw, grinding plant matter on bony plates in the tops of their mouths, others have enlarged molars that distribute the wear and break down plant matter more efficiently... Koalas are no exception, when their teeth erode down to nothing, they resolve the situation by starving to death, because they're fucking terrible animals. Being mammals, koalas raise their joeys on milk (admittedly, one of the lowest milk yields to body ratio... There's a trend here). When the young joey needs to transition from rich, nourishing substances like milk, to eucalyptus (a plant that seems to be making it abundantly clear that it doesn't want to be eaten), it finds it does not have the necessary gut flora to digest the leaves. To remedy this, the young joey begins nuzzling its mother's anus until she leaks a little diarrhoea (actually fecal pap, slightly less digested), which he then proceeds to slurp on. This partially digested plant matter gives him just what he needs to start developing his digestive system. Of course, he may not even have needed to bother nuzzling his mother. She may have been suffering from incontinence. Why? Because koalas are riddled with chlamydia. In some areas the infection rate is 80% or higher. This statistic isn't helped by the fact that one of the few other activities koalas will spend their precious energy on is rape. Despite being seasonal breeders, males seem to either not know or care, and will simply overpower a female regardless of whether she is ovulating. If she fights back, he may drag them both out of the tree, which brings us full circle back to the brain: Koalas have a higher than average quantity of cerebrospinal fluid in their brains. This is to protect their brains from injury... should they fall from a tree. An animal so thick it has its own little built in special ed helmet. I fucking hate them.

Tldr; Koalas are stupid, leaky, STI riddled sex offenders. But, hey. They look cute. If you ignore the terrifying snake eyes and terrifying feet.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/laughingabouttorture Nov 27 '21

Considering this, the art style is completely koala.

1

u/Puzzled_Fish_2077 Nov 27 '21

It's Treason then

2

u/ChangNoi97 Nov 27 '21

"hate hate this fucking art style" so you love this art style ?

1

u/PanTsour Nov 27 '21

hot take

1

u/[deleted] Nov 27 '21

[removed] — view removed comment

2

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1

u/CrescentCleave Nov 27 '21

She ate too much krabby patty 💀

1

u/pootis_engage Nov 27 '21

She do be shaped rather sussy tho.

1

u/throwaway_afterusage Nov 27 '21

what a shame it's used by corporates, it's not half bad

1

u/asschutney Nov 27 '21

it’s primal

1

u/UYScutiSN Nov 27 '21

This awful shit makes me physically ill

1

u/f18effect Nov 27 '21

This artstyle makes me want to clean my eyes with bleach

1

u/Skyaxe3 Nov 27 '21

I unironically like it

1

u/dapo64 Nov 27 '21

Great for ppl with foot fetish

1

u/Fisto-the-sex-robot Nov 27 '21

Why do they always have the pussy-eating/dick-sucking angle?

The companies trying to tell us something.

1

u/wizzy_wizardy Nov 27 '21

Also those artists who seem to think every white character they draw need to have red noses

1

u/YATALAX Nov 27 '21

"Art" style

1

u/ethanethereal Nov 27 '21

YAOI FEET YAOI FEET

1

u/not-no Nov 27 '21

It's one of those things corporates think people like but we don't. They're just not human anymore.

1

u/WM-010 Nov 27 '21

This artstyle looks makes every character look like somebody typed out a sentence with normal capitalization but had CAPSLOCK on.

1

u/LeoLaDawg Nov 27 '21

Bay Area tech trash

1

u/greenberrypike Nov 27 '21

Hello google fi

1

u/Pineapples0412 Nov 27 '21

Why are there 2 "hate" in the image?

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1

u/Kapt-Kaos Nov 27 '21

i hope whoever draws these has their fingers shrivel up like the most ashamed pack of devolved shrimps the world ever fucking seen

1

u/tcbucky8 Nov 27 '21

The music on those commercials is shit as well.

1

u/FizzBitch Nov 27 '21

Blame yellow submarine.

1

u/Griffis_ Nov 27 '21

The legs 😭

1

u/Revenge_Is_Here Nov 27 '21

I'm not the only one??? It's just so ugly and Corporate ™

1

u/techblackops Nov 27 '21

Strongly agree

1

u/zup3r4nd0mn1ck Nov 27 '21

I personally do like this :) Have a nice day

1

u/Harmony3319 Nov 27 '21

Corporate Memphis 🤢🤢🤮🤮

1

u/ogabrielpereira Nov 27 '21

It's almost an Abaporu

1

u/lil-fil Nov 27 '21

I wish we could go back to the 1950s advertisement art style

1

u/piesspark Nov 27 '21

The only good use of the art style is in going under to mock corporations but it actually looks good there

1

u/McBoomer_ Nov 27 '21

I also hate hate this new art style.

1

u/FreeWatermelons Nov 27 '21

Art for people who cant draw, so everyone can express themselves through art :-)

1

u/Gmarceau05 Nov 27 '21

Google fi the phone plan that can’t

1

u/Lazydude17 Nov 27 '21

It reminds me of southpark when they were first starting with cardboard cuts

1

u/_PabloX2_ Nov 27 '21

I hate it too