r/AskReddit Dec 03 '21 Silver 21 Gold 1 Helpful 32 Wholesome 36 Take My Energy 1 Duck Dance 2

What smells nicer than it tastes?

36.4k Upvotes

6.6k

u/Excalibur025 Dec 03 '21 Silver

Fresh cut pine. Amazing smell, little bit prickly of a taste.

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u/dumbass9669 Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 07 '21 Silver Gold

Sparkling water.

I get so fucking excited only to have the promise of the sweet taste of grape fruit ripped out of my shaking finger tips while I curse at the Gods for ever letting there be such an abomination able to pervert my mouth with endless TV static and the lost and shredded soul of what was one my beloved grape fruit. God is dead and I wish I was too.

Edit: thank you so much for the awards! I've never gotten any before :) you guys are the best! (But not if you like sparkling water👁)

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u/shallow-waterer Dec 03 '21 Silver Gold Helpful Wholesome Evil Cackle Wholesome (Pro) Spit-take

I see we’ve got a lot of gasoline drinkers in this thread.

6.2k

u/skyxsteel Dec 03 '21 Silver Gold Helpful Wholesome

Unleaded tastes a little tangy. Supreme is kinda sour, and diesel tastes pretty good.

1.7k

u/Whiteup Dec 03 '21

We’re sick from stealing so much gas.

1.4k

u/Bamres Dec 03 '21 Wholesome

Stealing gas? why Cory and Trevor that's highly illegal. You shouldn't be stealing gas Cory and Trevor.

82

u/Tarmek12 Dec 03 '21

Smokes, let’s go.

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u/rapi187 Dec 03 '21

Only wack suckas like Cory and Trevor steal gas...and deal dope.

220

u/endicott2012 Dec 03 '21

They got community service which isn't bad, but to be honest they could use this as a learnin situation

153

u/gsomething Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 03 '21

Thank God for the People's Freedom of Choices and Voices Act

148

u/resolvetomajor Dec 03 '21

I spin more rhymes than a lazy Susan, and I'm innocent until my guilt is proven.

Peace. Representing Sunnyvale, straight the fuck up.

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u/kuriboshoe Dec 03 '21

Just look at them, that's gas sickness

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507

u/bobjarkings Dec 03 '21

If I can’t smoke and swear I’m fucked

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401

u/Haydenwayden Dec 03 '21

Fuck off ricky

84

u/dotslashpunk Dec 03 '21

A toad a so! You know i don’t like to say a toad a so

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u/Dmopzz Dec 03 '21

Survival of the fitness

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152

u/mcnokes Dec 03 '21 Helpful

I will always upvote Trailer Park Boys.

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102

u/OutlyingPlasma Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 03 '21

That explains so much.

Edit: Seriously though, why are you people eating dry erase markers, wood animal bedding, paint, petrol, candles, laundry soap,hand lotion, holiday Cinnamon brooms, and everything else listed here?

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1.8k

u/Needmoresnakes Dec 03 '21

When I was young I had a misunderstanding with a hairdresser that resulted in me crying. Hairdresser felt really bad and gave me some hair goo stuff to help it and it smelled and looked EXACTLY like strawberry Yogo but it just tasted like soap

414

u/basicbitchslapshot Dec 03 '21

That was a wild ride....

79

u/golden_finch Dec 03 '21

I started using a new shampoo a few months ago and it smells like watermelon jolly ranchers. Maui Moisture lightweight hydration. So yummy smelling, not so yummy tasting.

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u/[deleted] Dec 03 '21

[deleted]

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4.1k

u/de606106 Dec 03 '21

Lip Smacker Coca-Cola Lip Gloss

1.1k

u/carm_aud Dec 03 '21 Silver

It’s for the best that these things don’t taste good. I had a version of this but in chapstick form and ate the whole stick. I can’t imagine eating tubes of lip gloss.

604

u/Environmental_Ad1922 Dec 03 '21

You…you ate chapstick?

601

u/FaeryLynne Dec 03 '21

I'm going to guess they were a kid in the 90s. There was a lot of great scented things at the time, and a lot of them got eaten - even if they weren't meant to be. At least this was something that was meant to be put near your mouth, instead of, say, Mr Sketch grape scented markers 👀😂

51

u/NachoMan_SandyCabage Dec 03 '21

Hearing the name "Mr Grape Scented Markers" only remindes me of how sick I felt sniffing the black one. It left a pit in my stomach :(

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19.4k

u/NoMethod3398 Dec 03 '21 Helpful Wholesome

Cocoa powder

6.3k

u/Sonnuvah Dec 03 '21

Oh man, the first time I saw a square of baker's chocolate and tried to eat it. I'm making the same face typing it as I did trying it four decades ago.

3.5k

u/basilicux Dec 03 '21 Helpful Giggle

Absolutely. My mom was chopping some up and I asked to try it so she let me but was not expecting me to shove the whole puck in my mouth. We were both disappointed that day.

62

u/citymouse61 Dec 03 '21

My 3 year old tried bakers chocolate. He made the face I was expecting, but then he grabbed the sugar bowl and dipped the chocolate in it. He's 30 now, but boy oh boy was he a lot of work lol

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u/ChipsAhoyNC Dec 03 '21 Wholesome

... i buy artisanal handmade bakers chocolate from an old lady the stuff is 100% no sugar no added fat, it smells gorgeous i like the taste even if its bitter.

A couple of times i left then in my car it smelled glorious for days.

901

u/Palana Dec 03 '21

Montezuma liked your comment

Montezuma subscribed to your page

264

u/Sperlli Dec 03 '21

Trade offer screen pops up

111

u/ijiolokae Dec 03 '21

I know you gonna betray me in 20 or so turns or be My best friends for the rest of the game while everyone else hates me, and i will never say no to that

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1.1k

u/gonejellyfishin77 Dec 03 '21

Yep that and vanilla extract are both incredibly disappointing.

159

u/xrumrunnrx Dec 03 '21

My dad got me with that as a kid. I kept saying I wanted some after hearing "vanilla" and finally he put a little on a spoon and said have at it.

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14.5k

u/KKmmaarriiee Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 03 '21 Silver Gold Helpful Wholesome All-Seeing Upvote

The water in the Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disneyland.

Edit: This is the most upvotes I’ve ever had on a post, and my first ever awards. Thanks everyone!!

473

u/AceTheProtogen Dec 03 '21 Silver

If you drink it you black out and become part of the ride

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2.9k

u/RobbinsBabbitt Dec 03 '21

This is an excellent contribution to this post

1.2k

u/KKmmaarriiee Dec 03 '21

I would buy a candle that smells like this ride lmao. I think they actually make one.

1.0k

u/adderallesspresso Dec 03 '21 Silver hehehehe

I have the candle. Its not the same. But it felt close. I lit it for about an hour and reminisced, until my husband came downstairs and asked if I left wet clothes in the washer again, and my dreams died.

124

u/LittleBigPortal Dec 03 '21

I laughed out loud at that one, thanks.

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u/procrastimom Dec 03 '21

Dead men smell no tales…

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39.0k

u/ne0n_laces Dec 03 '21 Silver Helpful Wholesome Starry This

Vanilla extract.

13.0k

u/natah7 Dec 03 '21 Silver Helpful Wholesome Take My Energy

Every so often I’ll sneak a tiny taste just in case it changed since the last time I tasted it. The absolutely intoxicating scent removes all logic from my brain and I continue to hope one day it tastes as good as I want it to

4.8k

u/ne0n_laces Dec 03 '21 Helpful

It seduces us.

1.4k

u/Alexwitminecraftbxrs Dec 03 '21

This is the best word for it honestly.

886

u/Palana Dec 03 '21

Reduction Seduction: The Life and Lies of A Vanilla Extract Saleman

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753

u/MawkishBird Dec 03 '21

We have the vanilla syrups for baking which is just vanilla extract in a very thick syrup. Tastes as good as it smells, thats for sure.

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u/Oomoo_Amazing Dec 03 '21

Ah that siren call. No man can resist.

1.1k

u/jamesdeandomino Dec 03 '21 Wholesome

reptilian brain moment

387

u/TwinSong Dec 03 '21

scrabbles up wall 🦎

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u/thebuttergod Dec 03 '21

I used to take sips of this as a child thinking it would get me drunk.

1.5k

u/drewhead118 Dec 03 '21 Helpful hehehehe I'll Drink to That

I love the image of a small child taking a sippy cup flask out of his jacket pocket and taking small swigs of vanilla extract while watching dora the explorer with a distant look, eyes watching Swiper but mind reliving the memories he'd rather drown in drink

500

u/thebuttergod Dec 03 '21

well, if you really want to know. I would sneak into the pantry. Locate the extract on the shelf, unscrew the lid, fill the top with extract (like a shot) then replace the lid, look out for mom, and bolt. I thought I was so fuckin sly.

PS: I didn't turn out to be an alcoholic BTW.

199

u/StartSelect Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 03 '21

I once found a bag of bath salts/smelly shit you dissolve in the bath in my parents bedroom. It was granules in a sealy bag and my 10 year old brain instantly was like 'cool, drugs' and swiftly pocketed that shit. I showed it to some bros at school super proudly and Jason fuckin rabbets knew exactly what it was and made me look the fool I was. Fuck u Jason

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u/ne0n_laces Dec 03 '21

It can actually do that.

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2.0k

u/Torchic336 Dec 03 '21 Wholesome

Any extract really, one night I was with some buddies and one of them had a bottle of peppermint extract for reasons I don’t recall. Turns out it’s about 90% alcohol and we started to wonder whether or not a bottle of it would get you drunk. After everyone took a small taste no one wanted to drink more. Then my friend told me he’d give me $20 to drink it, I have a history of doing mostly anything if I’m dared to. I accept and shoot the whole bottle in one swig. My throat and mouth burned but I felt relatively fine for about a minute. Out of nowhere my stomach started to feel like it was on fire and soon I felt like throwing up. I then spent the next 15 minutes puking in the bathroom, it was so violent that vomit started coming out of my nose which burnt like hell. I didn’t end up drinking anymore that night and I was blowing vomit out of my burning nose until the next morning. Wouldn’t recommend.

987

u/kartoffel_engr Dec 03 '21

Buddy in college was mixing lemon extra with Pepsi to get drunk in the dorms. Shit was wild after that.

Fast forward a few years and the same guy is making meth because “he wanted to see if he could”. Fights the cops, slashes a bunch of tires, and gets arrested. Not sure where he is now, but I can’t imagine he course corrected.

410

u/Torchic336 Dec 03 '21

Oh wow, there’s quite a difference between someone who drinks extract on a dare and someone that actively seeks it out it seems

372

u/Duckstiff Dec 03 '21

Lemon extract is a well known gate way drug.

462

u/Yadobler Dec 03 '21 All-Seeing Upvote

When life gives you lemons, turn it into drugs

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2.4k

u/lipuss Dec 03 '21

Sugar: taste better than it smells. Add that with vanilla and they complement each other

1.0k

u/ne0n_laces Dec 03 '21

Agreed. I tried vanilla extract by the spoonful though. Do not recommend.

701

u/arcaneresistance Dec 03 '21

Dudes in rehab used to drink it to get drunk.

697

u/I_Love_Spiders_AMA Dec 03 '21

Before I turned 21 I would buy lemon extract from Walmart in bulk. Lemon had the highest alcohol percentage and I would mix it with lemon lime soda. That was the start of my binge drinking and because I often made myself throw up at the end of every night to expel the calories, the acidity really fucked up my teeth for a while. Crazy times.

900

u/TerracottaBunny Dec 03 '21 Wholesome

Okay but what’s your favorite kind of spider

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u/ne0n_laces Dec 03 '21

There's a fair amount of alcohol in it. Approx. 5 ounces and you're drunk.

310

u/arcaneresistance Dec 03 '21

I know. I've dabbled when curiosity got the best of me. Was not as disgusting as I expected once I chased the flavour away but also didn't drink enough to get really drunk. I work in addictions now and non-bev alcohol drunks are some of the most violent and unpredictable. Dangerous shit.

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u/eastbayweird Dec 03 '21

Vanilla extract is often 75%+ alcohol, so it's in the neighborhood of Bacardi 151 as far as getting hammered potential.

That said, I do NOT recommend drinking extracts as a means to get drunk. Back in the day I had a friend who showed up to school on day with a water bottle full of almond extract. He tricked me into drinking from it (it was perfectly clear, so I thought it was water) and it was like drinking liquid fire. I've never drank anything else that burned so bad... I didn't drink more than a swig, but my friend was determined to get hammered off of it and over the course of the evening managed to finish the bottle. He said besides the killer hangover, the only thing he remembers about the experience was that for like an entire week afterwards, every time he went to the bathroom (#1 or #2) the smell of almonds was so strong it was almost overpowering...

(Just to be clear, it's really not recommended to drinking extracts like this, the alcohol they use isn't meant to be consumed straight up, in fact it's really not supposed to be consumed at all as the actual alcohol is supposed to be cooked off when you cook whatever the dish is you put it in, leaving the flavor of the extracts behind. Also, most dishes require like maybe a tablespoon at most, so drinking enough to get drunk is hundreds of times more than the recommended serving size. It's just a bad idea.)

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9.8k

u/PigsGoMoo- Dec 03 '21

Laundry detergent. I had a patient once with pica during her pregnancy who couldn’t do laundry cuz the lemony scent would make her want to drink the detergent.

906

u/ihaveaquesttoattend Dec 03 '21

My friends brothers gf is pregnant and she says she keeps talking about wanting to drink and smell lighter fluid, wonder how that’s gonna end up

402

u/dutchlizzy Dec 03 '21

This can be a symptom of nutritional deficiency, called pica

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u/Xanderulz Dec 03 '21 Helpful

For those who don’t know:

“Pica is the practice of craving substances with little or no nutritional value. Most pregnancy and pica-related cravings involve non-food substances such as dirt or chalk. The word pica is Latin for magpie which is a bird notorious for eating almost anything. It is true that the majority of women will experience cravings during pregnancy; however, most of these cravings are for things like pickles and ice cream.”

https://americanpregnancy.org/healthy-pregnancy/is-it-safe/unusual-cravings-pica/

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1.8k

u/kjan1289 Dec 03 '21

I Had a similar experience! When I had pica I wanted to eat the arm & hammer scent beads.. it was so weird

1.1k

u/KittySMASH Dec 03 '21

When my mom was pregnant with me she wanted to drink Downy fabric softener because "it smelled so delicious". Luckily her other cravings were Big Macs and fried shrimp so I'm hoping she never had to resort to the fabric softener.

1.4k

u/linvmiami Dec 03 '21 Silver

Yeah you don’t want a soft kid

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u/dorkvader_ Dec 03 '21

I had pica as a child and used to eat Ajax. It tasted so good to me. My mom used to store it under the kitchen sink and I would sneakily eat it. So far I'm fine but I wonder if it caused any harm.

584

u/ninefeet Dec 03 '21

Half the people in Congress ate lead paint chips aka wall candy growing up.

So yes, it probably damaged you but you can still achieve if you believe.

295

u/awalktojericho Dec 03 '21

I truly feel like half of them still do.

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7.7k

u/SwampoO Dec 03 '21 Silver

Dry tobacco

653

u/Duke-Is-The-Best Dec 03 '21

I live in North Carolina and my hometown still has a lot of tobacco warehouses that store fresh tobacco before being shipped off for manufacturing. The whole town smells like it every fall and I love it. The smell somewhat reminds me of raisins

296

u/ElRoyOrbison Dec 03 '21

Ok so I am not the only one who gets a hint of raisin from tobacco

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2.1k

u/questionable_mind Dec 03 '21

This, why does it smell so sweet? I like it.

1.3k

u/sweetevangaline Dec 03 '21

I love the smell of a pouch of tobacco, not tailored cigarettes but straight tobacco. Soo good

798

u/snorlz Dec 03 '21

pipe tobacco is the best. so many different aromas

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431

u/NyranK Dec 03 '21 Silver

I was gifted some beard oil thats vanilla and tobacco scented. Ladies love it, even my girlfriend who is an anti-smoking asthmatic.

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3.5k

u/unruckingbelievable Dec 03 '21 Silver Helpful Wholesome

Fresh Sawdust

678

u/shubham030296 Dec 03 '21

Add cheese (just like every street food vendor in India)

110

u/Webbie-Vanderquack Dec 03 '21

As someone who hasn't been to India: can you elaborate?

199

u/kiddoaayush Dec 03 '21

Street food vendors across India, particularly the northern states, have developed a tendency to add cheese in copious amounts. Even to dishes that don't go with cheese. This is a recent change though with the advent of social media and reels I imagine. Because shit like this gets viral and could make you famous

24

u/Webbie-Vanderquack Dec 03 '21

Interesting. Thanks for explaining!

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31.4k

u/[deleted] Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 11 '21 Silver Helpful

[deleted]

8.2k

u/poopellar Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 03 '21 Silver Helpful Wholesome

Get them while they're hot.

3.7k

u/drewhead118 Dec 03 '21 Helpful

when it solidifies around your tongue, finally you have the armor and means to lick the stove without it making the crackly crunchies

7.9k

u/Poem_for_your_sprog Dec 03 '21 Silver Gold Helpful Wholesome Bravo! Table Slap Defeated

When Little Timmy sniffed the air,
And smelled a scent divine -
"What pretty thing is waiting there?
I want to make it mine!

"I love this smell of something sweet,
This whiff of something swell -
This fragrant hue of flavours neat,
On which I wish to dwell!

"I want, I need it in my soul!
I'll take my fill!" he cried.

So Timmy ate the candle whole.

And Timmy fucking died.

1.3k

u/FaBriski Dec 03 '21

You really need to collect your work in a book or something.

1.5k

u/Corrupt_Reverend Dec 03 '21 Silver Helpful Starry

448

u/FaBriski Dec 03 '21

Nice! Hope it's by the original author. Thanks.

535

u/penguinlad Dec 03 '21

They have posts on their account talking about that specific book, so you can rest easily knowing you're supporting the original author if you purchase the book linked above.

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586

u/horselips48 Dec 03 '21

Fresh Sprog with a side of dead Timmy. Always a pleasure to find.

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u/Winnipesaukee Dec 03 '21

And eat those super hot peppers Chief Wiggum somehow got for his chili.

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9.0k

u/Content_Pickle_8816 Dec 03 '21

Lotion

4.0k

u/Im_not_creepy3 Dec 03 '21 Helpful Wholesome

I genuinely used to eat lotion as a kid. I don't remember the taste but it must not have been so bad if I kept going back for second helpings.

3.6k

u/suckmysoggyballs Dec 03 '21 Wholesome

what the fuck

2.2k

u/LazilyOblivious Dec 03 '21 Silver Wholesome Bravo!

Forbidden yogurt

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632

u/Necessary-Project672 Dec 03 '21

'What the fuck' is correct.

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214

u/attofreak Dec 03 '21

okay, Charlie. Lotion was the gateway drug to Milksteak and cat food, wasn't it.

59

u/itsokay_i_googled_it Dec 03 '21

Sunblock is a good drink for the boardwalk though

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u/SadButterscotch2 Dec 03 '21 Wholesome

My little sister used to take the cushions off the couch and empty entire bottles of lotion out onto them, using the cushions like plates. Then take them into another room, lock the door, and eat all the lotion off of the couch cushion.

Sometimes when my mom tried to put lotion on my face, I'd lick it off, but at least I was never as crazy as my sister.

Oh, and my siblings have a friend who stole another friend's eczema lotion and spread it on a rice krispie treat for a snack.

244

u/The_Blue_Bomber Dec 03 '21

You're all demons of varying degrees.

Stand back, I tell you!

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205

u/beard_on_fire Dec 03 '21

This whole thing reads like a description of a corner of a Hieronymus Bosch painting.

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1.2k

u/AbigailSalt Dec 03 '21 Silver

No to all of that.

198

u/hummingbird_mywill Dec 03 '21

Your simple response has me in tears xD

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u/chillichickenandrice Dec 03 '21

Was it necessary to write all this down

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u/DilbusMcD Dec 03 '21

Nah. That’s more for rubbing it on the skin, or else it gets the hose again.

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13.8k

u/BotherMost Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 10 '21 Silver

Fresh coffee beans.

Edit: holy mother of upvotes! This is the most popular comment I've ever had. Simply from saying coffee beans. I'm at a loss for words. Thank you kind strangers 😂

4.9k

u/Ducks-Dont-Exist Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 04 '21 Wholesome

Hard agree. And the thing is, I like the taste of coffee and I take it black, unadulterated. But the smell is always so much richer, so much more complex and aromatic than the taste.

Only back in the 90s at a local coffee shop in Harrisburg did I have a cup that actually came close to that experience. So I know it's possible, but I've tried all the foofy hipster homebrew methods out there and none of them come close. I am left to assume it had more to do with the beans themselves than the preparation method. I simply have no idea what they were using or where they sourced them from. I miss you, Town Perk!

Edit: Sorry but replies are now disabled. There's no reason a comment about bean water should be this popular and I simply cannot keep up with my inbox.

2.5k

u/SolarYard Dec 03 '21

My man remembers his favourite cup. respect

779

u/MrTerribleArtist Dec 03 '21

Mine was from a tiny ass restraunt in the style of a 50s American diner. It was only around maybe three months before it closed never to be seen again. It served the tastiest black coffee I've ever had : /

299

u/SolarYard Dec 03 '21

I hope you find that coffe again oneday X

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u/reflectiveSingleton Dec 03 '21

ya'll a bunch of drug addicts chasing that first high

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u/VanFailin Dec 03 '21

I roast my own and get a lot closer to what you're describing. Plus I'm never out of coffee.

188

u/black_rabbit Dec 03 '21

Roasting your own and having a high quality grinder will make a huge difference in the quality of your morning brew. Plus, if you buy your green coffee in bulk you can really dial in your roast, grind, and preparation to have really great coffee tailored specifically to your own preferences. No more hoping that the roast is described accurately on the packaging.

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u/Fleaslayer Dec 03 '21

For me it's coffee in all forms. Love the smell, hate the taste.

439

u/the_turn Dec 03 '21

I actually love the taste, but even I have to admit that I love the smell even more.

352

u/BadgerSituation Dec 03 '21 Helpful

Coffee taste: 10/10

Coffee smell: 11/10

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u/itsjustfrankthabunny Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 04 '21

Black & Mild Cigars, I mean they smell fucking fantastic! Then you puff on one and realize its all a lie! If they had incense that smelled of B&M's I'd totally burn them.

Edit: who would've thought, starting a discussion on Black and milds would get me to the promise land of 1K upvotes!!! Good shit! This is why I love reddit!

90

u/Jollyjoe135 Dec 03 '21

Maybe I’ve smoked too many but the wood tipped sweets are great haha. The after taste is the real downside but that’s just tobacco man

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10.0k

u/heidismiles Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 03 '21 Silver Helpful

Cup o noodles. I'm disappointed every time but it always smells so good.

Late edit: y'all, there's a Tapatio brand instant noodle and it's sooo good! I put takis in it for extra heartburn. Really though look for it. It's in a big bowl.

942

u/VirtuosoX Dec 03 '21 This

usually all the flavour is in the broth which is why the broth is the best part.

248

u/[deleted] Dec 03 '21

Use less water and the noodles get more flavor. Pro tip trust me I'm a pro. I use almost no water, just wet the noodles and mix.

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4.5k

u/DarkAngelGenesis Dec 03 '21 Silver

Shampoo.

1.9k

u/Mx_Eclipse Dec 03 '21 Helpful

That’s why “poo” is right in the name

731

u/Sonnuvah Dec 03 '21

Something that smells so nice and tastes so bad is certainly a "sham"

582

u/Penguator432 Dec 03 '21 Helpful

Shampoo for my real friends, real poo for my sham friends

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1.6k

u/iBeelz Dec 03 '21 Wholesome

Those cinnamon brooms you buy at the supermarket

620

u/General-Ad-9753 Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 03 '21

Can someone explain to a very confused Englishman what a cinnamon broom is?

I’ve had a google and they (to my eternal shock) look like a broom made out of cinnamon. But what’s the point?

793

u/thrifty917 Dec 03 '21

They're basically straw brooms that are soaked in cinnamon oil and have a very strong scent. One purpose, the one I use it for, is to make your house smell like cinnamon and kind of wintery and Christmasy. The other purpose is superstition. Some people believe in keeping a cinnamon broom by the door so that you can sweep away bad spirits from your home.

807

u/7SpiceIsNice Dec 03 '21 Big Brain Time

The other purpose is to keep away unwanted guests.

You can directly smack them with the broom or you can wait for them to get a scent-triggered migraine and crawl pitifully away.

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u/lipuss Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 12 '21

Add some condensed milk to it

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744

u/temp465 Dec 03 '21

Febreeze. My wife leaves it on the counter next to the PAM sometimes. Makes terrible eggs.

101

u/A1000eisn1 Dec 03 '21

Ask that lady who was addicted to eating fabreeze. She loved it.

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250

u/PM_UR_TITS_OR_SNACKS Dec 03 '21

A campfire tastes terrible

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248

u/Capital_Team1152 Dec 03 '21 Silver

Coffee. I can’t tell you how many times I made coffee at home before realizing I really only love smelling it and not really drinking it.

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5.7k

u/MabelPod Dec 03 '21 Take My Energy

Deodorant

1.5k

u/FreeSpeechMatter1776 Dec 03 '21 Eureka!

Have you tried Tide Pods?

491

u/MabelPod Dec 03 '21

No but I accidentally put Gain scent beads in the laundry load that had kitchen towels in it and all the dishes I dried afterward had a faint moonlight breeze taste to them :(

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935

u/mack__7963 Dec 03 '21

Dude stop.

718

u/drewhead118 Dec 03 '21

the package called it old spice but it really tasted more like a bar of soap stored under a washing machine

217

u/poopellar Dec 03 '21

Well it did taste 'old'

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2.2k

u/Deftone85 Dec 03 '21

potpourri

740

u/Wilber187 Dec 03 '21

As a kid, my mum & dad used to have this enormous vase of pot pourri & dried flowers. I was curious what would happen if I just lit the corner. Honestly it went up like a lithium incendiary device for about 3 seconds, leaving the house full of black smoke and 2 charred stalks in the vase

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400

u/Neon_Camouflage Dec 03 '21

I knew I couldn't be the only one who tried to eat this shit growing up.

307

u/Deftone85 Dec 03 '21

Would you think any less of me if I was already grown up

302

u/Steeze4Days Dec 03 '21

I've got some good news. My grandfather, who was an otherwise sharp and successful man (all the way grown up), once ate potpourri... a near handful of potpourri. Grandpa didn't have the heart to tellmom that her snackmix sucked.

TL;DR Chin up. You're not the oldest potpourri eater.

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96

u/des_cho Dec 03 '21

I googled potpourri and only today I learned that it is scented dried flower. I always thought it is Indian food.

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980

u/Heisenburgermeth Dec 03 '21

Vanilla essence

228

u/lipuss Dec 03 '21

“Vanilla essence” sounds better then it tastes too

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1.8k

u/phyllispickle Dec 03 '21

Chapstick

423

u/phantompainssting Dec 03 '21 Silver

I love the taste of chapstick!

385

u/friendersender Dec 03 '21

Cherry chapstick

334

u/FuglySlutt Dec 03 '21

Did you kiss a girl and like it?

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741

u/NotYourAvgJoey Dec 03 '21 Wholesome

Play-Doh

276

u/dublybubly Dec 03 '21

Yes. Salty.

In other news, you can get play-dough perfume. Maybe not for wearing, but if you like the smell you can get it. Also tomato plants, newly mown grass, wet dirt, etc.

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160

u/drewhead118 Dec 03 '21

I used to have a coffee shop near me that would do these lavendar vanilla overnight oats and that ish tasted like how play-doh smells in an amazing way

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2.4k

u/LancerToTheMoon Dec 03 '21 Silver Wholesome

Gasoline/petrol

574

u/Ok_Soil_231 Dec 03 '21

Stop huffing gas, Lancer

615

u/poopellar Dec 03 '21 Silver

sad mitsubishi noises

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492

u/Specialist_Evening93 Dec 03 '21

Perfume

195

u/MissChefManaged Dec 03 '21

“…someone came out of one of the rooms at this party holding like an old antique bottle with some liquid in it, and they said, ‘Hey, is this whiskey or perfume?’ And apparently I grabbed it, drank all of it, and said, ‘It's perfume.’ …..And it was.”

95

u/lipuss Dec 03 '21 Helpful

You gotta chug it

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1.0k

u/_plot-twist_ Dec 03 '21

Dry erase markers

196

u/lipuss Dec 03 '21

Markers in general, sometimes even sharpies

144

u/drewhead118 Dec 03 '21

if god didn't want you to eat sharpies he wouldn't have made them so slurpable

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1.3k

u/Ninsito Dec 03 '21

Paint.

1.1k

u/drewhead118 Dec 03 '21 Helpful

the smell isn't something I'd ordinarily call good... it's just, so, compelling. Like, when you smell paint, you kinda want to hold it on the in-breath and analyze it, kinda like how you just want to stop and stare at a fascinating painting in a gallery.

It's captivating, bold, and inviting. Notes of earthy pigments and just the hint of an edge of chemicals under the flatness of plaster. And if it's still wet? You can feel the wetness of the paint right in between your eyes.

7/10, would inhale until brain damaged from fumes

773

u/MintIceCreamPlease Dec 03 '21 Silver Wholesome This

This dude fucks paint

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158

u/majdpy Dec 03 '21

why is this the most accurate description ever

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266

u/BurningPenguin Dec 03 '21

On a side note: In German we have a saying for people who are batshit crazy. "Der hat doch Lack gesoffen" = "He must have been drinking paint" (the kind of paint you'd put on cars. Not sure about the correct word for that.)

108

u/Leinks Dec 03 '21

Not German but we have a similar expression translated into "Did you drink gas (kerosene)?" meaning "Are you crazy?"

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1.3k

u/invader_felix Dec 03 '21

Certain soaps

967

u/tsagdiyev Dec 03 '21

I’d argue all soaps smell better than they taste

651

u/drewhead118 Dec 03 '21

I'd argue that soaps can neither smell nor taste since they have no noses or tongues

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110

u/Fcktheadmins Dec 03 '21

Certain? What are the tasty ones? I bet that goat milk and oatmeal one isnt too bad

211

u/badFishTu Dec 03 '21 Silver

Soap taste ranked more pleasant to least pleasant.

Dove face soap

Pumice soap

Dawn dish soap

Tide liquid laundry detergent

Dove bar soap

Irish Springs

Dial soap

Fels Napa

Anti dandruff Selson Blue or something

Same brand and purpose, but mentholated.

Source: was sassy kid.

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