r/AskReddit Dec 02 '21 Silver 1 Helpful 1 Wholesome 3

People with ADD / ADHD, what are your biggest problems related to ADD / ADHD?

3.1k Upvotes

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u/ChipTheOcelot Dec 02 '21 edited Dec 03 '21 Silver

Not being able to do something even if you need to do it. You just can’t (executive function issues). Thinking a grocery trip is going to take the whole day and being surprised Pikachu when it takes less than a hour (Time blindness). Being in class and then realizing you didn’t get anything of what the teacher said bc you were thinking about why there is so much pumpkin food in Harry Potter when pumpkins don’t really grow in Europe (attention defecet). Thinking one little mess up ruins your life ex. Thinking somone hates you because you accidentally bumped into them in the hall (rejection sensitive dysphoria). Intensely focusing one one subject for weeks or months at a time (hyperfixation). Trouble sleeping (insomnia), having very high energy (hyperactivity), having emotional outbursts (emotional control issues). Not everyone with this disorder has all of these symptoms, but these are common

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u/sdpeasha Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 03 '21

My husband is in his early 40s. We’ve been married 16 years and last year he FINALLY saw his doctor about adhd (after our SECOND child, age 12,was diagnosed). Then we had a whole eval done to figure out his strengths and weaknesses in cognitive function. Rejection sensitively disorder came up and was one of the biggest game changers for us as a couple. Our marriage is solid but MY GOD every time I needed to say something to him that was not great (please stop leaving the socks on the floor, hey I know it bugs you when you have long ear hairs so I thought I’d let you know you have one right now) it was like I’d just told him I don’t love him anymore.

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u/nnndude Dec 03 '21

My wife has self diagnosed herself with adult ADHD and omg this makes a lot of sense. If I offer one bit of advice I’m “mansplaining” or attacking her intelligence. So I just don’t. Things have literally been broken/ruined around the house because I’d rather her not get upset.

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u/HorrorLine Dec 02 '21

Constant internal monologue interrupts studying, watching TV, and even playing games.

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u/wholesomehusband Dec 02 '21

Dude. This is me. Fuck. My wife could be telling me a story and I’m paying attention and looking at her and boom. My inner voice is going ham. And nothing gets heard. Or remembered

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u/Dark_Aster566 Dec 03 '21

Same bro. Hard to hold conversations that aren’t about a topic I’m immediately interested i.

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u/[deleted] Dec 02 '21 edited Dec 20 '21

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u/BoBatFettman Dec 02 '21

It's like living in the Architects room (from The Matrix 3) all your life and then someone turns off all the TVs and you're just alone with your thought.

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u/[deleted] Dec 02 '21

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u/yuri4491 Dec 02 '21

This hits home hard for me.

I was prescribed Adderall 10mg for an ADHD diagnosis about 3 months ago. I've since bumped my dose to 15mg this month with my Dr. As it has helped me focus my inner monologs and have better control of the "conversations' in my head.

Interestingly enough, I have found that, when taking SMALL amounts of sativa (strain of marijuana), periodically, gives me the same effect. However, taking a larger amount of sativa makes it much much worse and those conversations run wild. I am in no way advocating anyone to do the same, just stating my findings in the last 3 months since my diagnosis.

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u/pineapplewin Dec 02 '21

Yes! I constantly start talking to people where I've skipped over the first half of a sentence because it's already cycled through my brain, and I forget to say it out loud again

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u/Bakecrazy Dec 02 '21

At the begining of our relationship I would tell my husband I told him something and he swore I had not. Turned out I thought about telling him and my brain just registered it as done.😂

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u/forthe_loveof_grapes Dec 03 '21

God, this happens to me with text messages. See the message, think of a response, get distracted, think I sent it, find out that NO, I didn't let the thought leave my brain.

Luckily my family amd friends understand and know to bug me 😂

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u/W0rk3rB Dec 02 '21

Dude! Right there with you! Then when I take my Adderall, it’s super helpful, but damnit does it make my mouth dry. It’s like “do you want to be able to think today OR not have to drink water constantly?”

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u/IckyBeans Dec 02 '21

This is quite literally how I feel. Even in an important scene in single player games or movies, or in classes my mind will just wander and I can't focus on the thing at hand, I will just think of others completely unrelated.

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u/Stalennin Dec 02 '21

This. A thousand time this.
I work as a technician right now, and if I can't even begin to describe how frustrating it is so put down a screw, start thinking about some random thing and then spend 30 minutes looking for that damn screw.

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u/_Norman_Bates Dec 02 '21

Constant internal monologue

Isn't that just how existence works?

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u/xcoalminerscanaryx Dec 02 '21

I like to watch YouTube for entertainment a lot and I have a tendency to have to restart videos over and over, especially if they're new ones because my thoughts will always overtake me listening to the video. I have playlists of videos I'm familiar with so I can faze in and out.

Also, I don't have ADHD/ADD, or at least was never diagnosed, but these answers are starting to worry me...

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u/throwingplaydoh Dec 02 '21 Take My Energy

I can't vouch for anyone else, but I feel this hard. I can't ever stop thinking several things at once. For example, someone mentions watching a TV show I haven't seen (like Squid game), I'll imagine a large group of squids, then that will turn into thinking about Finding Nemo, then I'll think of Ellen Degeneres, and I'll think of Rosie O'Donnell, then Disney's Tarzan, then Wayne Knight, then I'll get on the thought of "I wonder how he lost all that weight...", and THEN I'll actually ASK THAT THOUGHT out loud assuming the other person was thinking along that same path. Now....think of that, but all the fucking time.

It's absolutely fucking exhausting.

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u/bangersnmash13 Dec 02 '21

I've never seen this described so perfectly. My wife asked me to explain what I feel when I get "distracted" I told her it's like thinking of a million things at once. I can read a word like "Transformer" and start thinking about the movies. Then I'll think of Shia LeBeouf, which will make me think of his Disney show, Even Stevens. Then I'll start thinking about the shows on the channel from my childhood. Then my brain thinks of another word, and I'm off on a completely different tangent.

It's worse with music. I'll hear a guitar lick and go "Oh that reminds me of this band" and put THAT band on and that cycle takes a while to stop too.

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u/inconspicuous_spidey Dec 02 '21

I am so weird. I have self interviews with myself. Its kinda of a coping mechanism I have to work through my feelings (basically I am a therapist to myself). Somehow it always starts off with me describing the event and then five minutes later I am on some tangent about a parallel but different story. Then ten minutes later I am talking about horses or dogs or fish in the sea, and no longer about how im worried my boss is gonna take the mistake I made.

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u/mr_impastabowl Dec 02 '21

That's a great coping mechanism. I'll talk to myself often to work out my personal issues. Just me asking myself questions and then answering honestly, without any ego or front (because it's just me, right?) And evolving the conversation from there.

A little bit like Gollum in Two Towers except every solution is trying to be positive (fish) instead of negative (the one ring).

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u/throwingplaydoh Dec 02 '21

Yes!! As I was writing my comment, all I had to do was listen to where my thoughts were leading naturally 😂

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u/Desulto Dec 02 '21 edited Dec 02 '21

I've heard that called dolphin-minding. Can't remember who originally said it but basically you swim through all these thoughts really fast, like how a dolphin swims super fast, and jump out of the water every few thoughts to say something.

So you have this thoughtstream that you can understand, including the spoken parts, but other people only witness the spoken parts because that's all they see of the dolphin - they can't see everything that's going on below the surface.

Edit: found screenshots of the original Twitter thread

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u/Faithless195 Dec 02 '21

Society - "Have you seen Squid Game?"

/u/throwingplaydoh - "How did Wayne Knight lose all that weight?"

Society - "Clearly this person is a serial killer."

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u/Bludrust Dec 02 '21

Quite often when im talking to someone il get this mid sentence and i end up talking utter shit and making no sense at all. It makes job interviews, for example, unbelievably difficult, because it when im asked a question il give a completely irrelevant answer and look like an idiot.

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u/throwingplaydoh Dec 02 '21

Yes, this as well. It's such a mental drain trying to stay on topic, especially in job interviews, like you said. I have no idea how NTs can stay on topic like they do; it's like when I'm close to the end of my thought I also have to ask myself if I've answered the question, repeat the question out loud, and answer it again. So annoying!

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u/TRiceTheEffort Dec 02 '21

My mom mentioned her boss being slightly ADHD at the table at Thanksgiving, and how she (being borderline ADHD herself), organized his office for him a while ago.

My brain, in one second as she was talking still:

"ADHD people typically don't do well when other people organize their stuff, or at least I don't. If someone reorganized my RV I'd be upset. I just organized my RV last week." proceeds to go through each cabinet and compartment one by one to remember where everything is

Edit: I did the cabinet search in my head, not physically

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u/throwingplaydoh Dec 02 '21

Can't remember shit on what my boss asked me to do, but I DO remember where that pen I dropped is (on the floor in the kitchen next to the sink, and if I move it I won't know where I can find a pen when I need it)

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u/YoHeadAsplode Dec 02 '21

This is why I tell my spouse I was listening but my brain spiraled from there, sometimes I can remember the thought track and explain it.

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u/Fredredphooey Dec 02 '21

I speak slowly, which makes people insane, because there's five things in my brain jamming up like old fashioned typewriter keys. I have to sort through them to find the right/ best one.

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u/[deleted] Dec 02 '21 edited Dec 02 '21

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u/Aware_Requirement_15 Dec 02 '21

I thought so but other people tell me I have racing thoughts. For me they're just my normal thoughts

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u/Oh-OkayThen Dec 02 '21

Anybody else with adhd ever have that feeling where there is so much to but you can’t bring yourself to do anything like you just sit around thinking about home much shit you have to do

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u/starcatalyst Dec 02 '21

Executive dysfunction team unite! I will waste hours scrolling on my phone while internally screaming at myself to go wash the damn dishes that will only take 5 minutes but I just. Can't. Get. Up.

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u/slipangle Dec 03 '21

I'm staring at those fucking dishes right now.

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u/starcatalyst Dec 03 '21

Go do them! (If it helps to have someone tell you to do it. Otherwise feel free to ignore me lol)

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u/GaspingAloud Dec 03 '21

Having someone else tell me to do a specific task always helps me. I don’t like listening to the voices in my head because they constantly change their minds about what’s the top priority. That’s kind of the crux of the problem.

But, ya, some random stranger on the internet told someone else to do the dishes means I can internalize that and now I’ll go do the dishes. Thanks, random stranger!!! (StarCatalyst) ❤️

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u/DestroyThaBeast Dec 02 '21

Best advice i got (fellow adhd here) dont fight it. Give in. Go do whatever you want to do for like an hour, set a timer on your phone, and imagine EXACTLY, Step by Step, what youre going to do when that timer is up. Pick one thing. Then go back to fucking off. If you can do one thing a day youll be golden

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u/Kiekis Dec 03 '21

"One thing a day" has helped me so much. Yes, I have a lot of things I need to do. Yes, I'm incredibly overwhelmed and procrastinating. But telling myself that today I only need to do one of those things makes it feel a lot more manageable. When I do the one thing, I feel good about myself, and sometimes I end up gathering momentum that lets me get another thing done

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u/ThreeToTheHead Dec 02 '21

Holding patterns. For example if I work at 12.30 I can’t do anything for the day until I go to work. I have to wait to go to work. Medication has helped that but sometimes I slip back into a holding pattern and do absolutely nothing until it’s time to leave.

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u/bangersnmash13 Dec 02 '21

My wife will tell me I should get up earlier for work so I have time to sit before I have to go. I have to tell her that my brain simply won't allow that. All it will do is give me anxiety by looking at the clock every 5 minutes saying "ugh only X more minutes until I need to leave." I need just enough time to get ready, eat a small breakfast and leave. Anything longer will make me pace for no reason and probably give me thoughts of calling out.

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u/TheTrub Dec 02 '21

On the other hand, if I get up early and do something before work (read the news, play a game, etc.) I can never quite get into work-mode and it’s an uphill battle all day.

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u/Tchrspest Dec 02 '21

Exactly. I can do one Thing per day. On workdays, work has to be that Thing. If it isn't, I can't focus on work and I get nothing done.

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u/i_do_it_all Dec 02 '21

Exactly. I can do one Thing per day. On workdays, work has to be that Thing. If it isn't, I can't focus on work and I get nothing done.

true! I take care of my daughter every morning and getting back to work is just difficult. Today @ 11:30 i had to do *something* and i couldn't work before or after.

Its a struggle no-one will understand but us people . Its a burden man.

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u/Tchrspest Dec 02 '21

The worst for me is always anything medical. Especially when I was in the military, where it's just commonly accepted that you leave in the middle of the day for medical and come right back to work. I can't do anything Before because I might get distracted and forget about the Appointment, but I can't do anything After because I've already had the Appointment and thus the day is Over.

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u/arandomperson7 Dec 02 '21

I've learned I can play competitive games before work. Something like overwatch quick play works well because it's ~10 minutes per match and the action is so frantic it makes me forget I'm waiting for work. And eventually I get so frustrated with my team that I just can't play another one and I go to work.

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u/ravenshadoe Dec 02 '21

Oh my god. Is that what that is?!?! I have been trying for years to figure out why I do that! I knew I had ADD I just never connected that weirdness with it!

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u/bangersnmash13 Dec 02 '21

Well I won't claim that this is a thing exclusive to people with ADD/ADHD but it explained a lot for when I was officially diagnosed.

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u/Endysis_Aponia Dec 02 '21

That's not normal? I hate when university starts at 16.00 because I just "can't" do anything until then.

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u/GuyFromDeathValley Dec 02 '21

say, do you also have that thought in your head all day repeatedly telling you "hey, you gotta be at university at 16.00!"?

Because that's what it is like for me. Constantly making sure I don't dare forget. If I get up at 8AM and have an appointment at 8PM, I can't even take a nap because of this.

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u/pinkyhc Dec 02 '21

I have been calling this ADHD Waiting Mode, and had no idea it had to do with hyper focus. It is a Very Annoying feeling, like you just have to sit there in time out with your damn shoes on (so you don't panic and forget where you put the ones you wanted to wear) for an annoying number of minutes. Usually more than ten but less than twenty.

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u/ExorciseAndEulogize Dec 02 '21

Is there somewhere I can read more about this? I tried to look up holding patterns but came up with different things not related to ADD.

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u/Aminar14 Dec 02 '21

I would look up Executive Disfunction. This isn't a Hyper-Focus thing perse. It's the mind having a hard time prioritizing. Often times, at least for me, it's couple with a bone deep exhaustion when I think about doing something early, different, or unknown. At least until it's urgent. Makes it hard to get ahead on things. I've slowly built systems that make it less of an issue but it's for sure the worst part of ADHD.

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u/terrrrrible Dec 02 '21

a bone deep exhaustion when I think about doing something early, different, or unknown

this describes EXACTLY how I feel most of the time. my brain can make a minor task that may consist of one or two things, and somehow breaks it down into like ten things that are going to take forever each, so I just end up putting it off, or it never gets done. But the times I do just act when I need to, it never takes as long as I think it is, but I can never just remember that for the next task that comes along.

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u/ExorciseAndEulogize Dec 02 '21

The fact every single one of yall experience this is blowing my mind. I've never talked to anyone about this. I've also never been diagnosed with adhd, and im not sure I have it. I just have a lot of anxiety and most definitely struggle with this.

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u/this_is_awkward_912 Dec 02 '21

Try looking into task paralysis. That’s still not exactly the thing I want to call it but I can’t for the life of me think of the right term.

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u/ExorciseAndEulogize Dec 02 '21

Bro, that's perfect thank you.

I have never been diagnosed Adhd but this sounds exactly like me. Its a big source of stress and guilt in my life.

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u/throwaway88873 Dec 02 '21 edited Dec 03 '21

These “holding patterns” are actually just hyper focus which is a symptom of adhd.

Essentially we are unable to really control what we focus on and often when we are compensating because we know we have to be somewhere and cannot forget, that hyper focus gets engaged.

So look up hyperfocus!

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u/inconspicuous_spidey Dec 02 '21

I have had ADHD my whole life and am even part of a support group. This is something I have been trying to explain (I hate change and have a hard time doing things not in my pattern and even harder creating a new one. its why I cant just work half a day. Its full day or nothing) and this just...brings me relief to see if put in words.

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u/ExorciseAndEulogize Dec 02 '21

Holy shit. My mind is being blown right now. You are putting into words the exact things I've been feeling and having guilt over for a very long time, but haven't been able to express. Thanks so much.

I said this just the other day. When it comes to work i m never late. Im either there on time, thw whole day or I call in.

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u/_Norman_Bates Dec 02 '21

Same here but I didn't know that was an ADHD symptom. I just see it as not being able to relax and do things if I know I have a burden coming up so I have to be done with it first.

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u/[deleted] Dec 02 '21

To me I feel like I’m late to work or missing work then I end up getting so anxious that I can’t really get anything done and it messes up my whole day. I have to work morning to 4-5 pm because afternoon shifts or varying shifts just don’t work for me

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u/soline Dec 02 '21

Isn’t that a normal thing? I feel like I can’t do anything before I have an appointment scheduled or have to go to work.

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u/Kabrallen Dec 02 '21

Time. It's weird. Telling me about an appointment in 2 days is meaningless. It's not today, so it might as well be 2 years from now.

Also paralysis. If plans suddenly change, I can't do anything. I can physically do nothing until the new plan is completed.

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u/RadiantHC Dec 02 '21 edited Dec 02 '21

Especially with school assignments. I always forget about them(well technically I still remember them, it's just at the back of my mind) until the last minute.

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u/Alfheim Dec 02 '21

But wow that crisis energy am I right? Talk about the drive to perform when its the night before a project is due. The only thing that ever got me through a project earlier then that, all the way through grad school is working on a group project. Then I let my shame force me to turn out work I was not proud of because otherwise the group would suffer!

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u/Motivational-Panda Dec 02 '21

Personally, when people change plans/schemes or anything it creates a kind of noise in my brain. I need to keep track of who said what at what time and all the changes just create an unneccesairy load of information.

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u/[deleted] Dec 02 '21

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u/Historical-Survey388 Dec 02 '21

Watching tv. I start a new movie? 5 minutes in im already on my phone. New tv series? After 10 minutes i'm already bored and have to stop it. It's very annoying because i'm curious what is happening next but i can't focus enough..

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u/DemocraticRepublic Dec 02 '21 Gold Wholesome I'll Drink to That

Smartphones just seem designed to fuck over people with ADHD. Oh you have problems concentrating? Well how about we give you a device that has instant access to all the information in the world on it.

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u/Just-Call-Me-J Dec 02 '21

And also has access to reddit

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u/Sirdraketheexplorer Dec 03 '21

That coupled with the endless cycle oscillating between "everything is interesting" jumping down a labyrinth of rabbit holes and just scrolling and hunting for something to trip your trigger, everything is mundane but you just can't stop.

A smart watch has really helped. It restricts access to mostly communication and music control. Stops the "I can handle a quick peek at reddit" random time wasting during the day.

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u/Safraninflare Dec 02 '21

Fuck I missed that. rewinds immediately looks away FUCK I MISSED THAT. rewinds and immediately looks away FUCK—

Rinse, repeat.

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u/Silent-G Dec 02 '21

The biggest lie I tell myself is "I probably won't miss anything if I just check this one notification."

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u/Endysis_Aponia Dec 02 '21

What helps for me is Anime or series I need subtitles for.

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u/starcatalyst Dec 02 '21

Subtitles are hard for me because I focus too much on them and don't actually see what's happening on screen 😭

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u/Endysis_Aponia Dec 02 '21

It takes time to learn how to read subtitles and watch at the same time. But once it's a subconscious action it's great, I don't even notice that I'm reading them anymore.

Sadly I can't really recommend anything as I've been doing it for my whole life but I bet that after 10 hours of using them it's going to get easier.

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u/shadingnight Dec 02 '21

I catch myself doing this still even on my meds, luckily it's something I can stop once I realize I am doing it.

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u/Mangobunny98 Dec 02 '21

Hyper fixation. If I'm into something it's staying that way at least for a couple weeks and I will try to learn everything I can about it.

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u/rach_jeffries Dec 02 '21

and buy all the things!!

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u/KwisatzHaterach Dec 02 '21

stares at her massive VR gaming apparatuses and game catalog she hasn’t touched in a year

It kind of makes me hate myself

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u/Enigma_Stasis Dec 02 '21

I keep buying Gameboy and Nintendo DS systems.....

I don't need 4 GBAs, but I have 4 GBAs.

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u/throwingplaydoh Dec 02 '21

Oh....this one hurts. I hyperfocused on art and I spent a ton of money to get alcohol markers, paint, sketch books....haven't touched them in months.

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u/atworking Dec 02 '21

I hate this about myself. I'm either 10000% into something or I just don't fucking care about it at all. I can't like put one thing down for a while and focus on another.

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u/ConnorK12 Dec 02 '21

I do this all the time. It’s like a different intense interest every week or two. I didn’t realise this was related to ADHD.

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u/_Release_The_Bats_ Dec 02 '21

My most recent hyperfixation was Stardew Valley. I filled up a sketchbook with fanart of one of my favorite NPCs and my farmer OC.

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u/techie_boy69 Dec 02 '21 Helpful

Life is bloody hard on so many levels, the crazy ideas that go nowhere, the buying into ideas and hobbies you drop instantly, the sky high highs and lows of relationships burn most normal people out. the inability not to be reactive to situations and the emotions that come with it is a constant problem, especially as a guy. most people take for granted planning and executive functions but that’s broken with ADHD so constantly forgetting and putting off or just blind to doing the things that are important short medium and long term. I know what I need to do but just can’t so it’s chaos and deadline chasing all the time. Then the F*#k it risk taking that other just think your crazy and the ADHD brain thinks it’s great fun, it’s great in your teens and 20’s if it doesn’t kill you, but catastrophic as you get older.

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u/DextrosKnight Dec 02 '21

Wait, are you telling me going all-in on a new hobby and then completely dropping it a short time later is an ADHD symptom? This thread has been so eye opening for me.

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u/TPAMMT Dec 02 '21

There are a lot of times where I think about doing something but don't because I know it'll take a lot of time to get good at it, or to complete it (ex: a new video game or trying out painting) so I just waffle and never do it. Instead I just do the same ol, same ol... or nothing at all.

But I've decided, fuck it, just do the thing and try it out. Maybe I'll play 20 minutes of this game, or only read part of this book; it's ok if I abandon it because I experienced it. It's not a failure, it's me exploring and discovering things.

Perhaps it's a fear of failure or insecurity in not doing something the right way or guilt for "leaving one more project unfinished". I've found this shifted mindset to be pretty freeing at times and lifts a bit of mental weight off me.

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u/viscount16 Dec 02 '21

I've gone through the same progress. I call it "hobby collecting." Learning to recognize that the enjoyment is in trying new things rather than mastering/completing them frees up a lot of the "another thing I didn't finish" guilt.

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u/leetoki Dec 02 '21

Haha, welcome. ADHD diagnoses never seems to begin with a doctors suggestion, it’s always a meme or conversation where you go “hang on… that’s been me my entire life”.

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u/INTERNET_POLICE_MAN Dec 02 '21

I have this. I pick something up, buy and learn everything at an incredible rate, and then one day it’s gone. Only just learning recently that this may be ADHD.

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u/DextrosKnight Dec 02 '21

Laughs in 3D printer that has sat unused for 6 months

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u/INTERNET_POLICE_MAN Dec 02 '21

Laughs (the crying type) in £3000 of radio equipment, custom antennas, and a 30 metre cable that I almost died fitting, a bunch of licenses, and a custom enclosure for the equipment.

(And my 3D printer - almost a year here with 6 boxes of PLA unused.)

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u/throwingplaydoh Dec 02 '21

Having ADHD in my 30s is the worst. I'm never taken seriously and I struggle a lot. I see my peers succeed around me and I feel stagnant. Also I completely agree with dealing with strange emotions. I couldn't cry at my grandparents funeral, but will randomly think of them and I burst into tears. It ruins my life in small ways every day....

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u/StreetIndependence62 Dec 02 '21

I have ADHD too, I get the “not taken seriously” part. Wanna talk about it?

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u/placiosexuality Dec 02 '21 Helpful

There’s a profound mental discomfort when doing something “your brain” doesn’t want to do, if you’re medicated. It’s genuinely mentally taxing to do things that are “boring”, even if they’re something you want to be doing. Now, this is better than when you’re unmedicated, where it’s simply impossible to push through and force yourself to do them at all.

Something that hasn’t been mentioned anywhere is the depression. ADHD inherently messes with your reward system, and in doing so, can in and of itself be a cause for depression (specifically one that looks similar to persistent depressive disorder with depressive episodes). Many ADHD symptoms are actually persistent-depressive symptoms, or made worse by the depression involved.

It’s also often comorbid with anxiety, which can be governed by similar mechanisms to depression (though not always). Though it can be influencer enough of anxiety without inherently causing it: You fundamentally think and act differently from others, and the world isn’t built to your scale.

Also, it’s practically impossible for me (and other ADHDers I know) to form habits. Even if you do something at the same time every day, if you accidentally miss a day, chances are you’ll miss the next few too. It’s a conscious effort to do things on a daily basis, especially hygiene. Shoutout to dental hygiene, I promise I really do try.

Also: ADD isn’t a real diagnosis anymore, as far as I know. It’s just considered a subtype of ADHD now, since it’s not really different except in how it looks on the outside.

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u/ses-qui-pedalian Dec 02 '21

forming habits is so difficult. do i want to add consistent exercise to my daily routine? yes. have i been trying to do it for the past 10 years unsuccessfully? also yes. it's not that i get too lazy and choose not to do it. if it's not already a part of my routine i just forget about it. i'll go days with the thought of exercising not crossing my mind once, until i finally see my weights or yoga mat and remember, "oh yeah. i was supposed to be getting healthy." it's also super frustrating to talk about it with people who don't get it, because you always get the "stop being lazy. just do it!" when it's not that simple.

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u/Buffalones Dec 03 '21

Am bipolar 2, have ADHD, suffer from depressions off and on and anxiety attacks. I’m either 100% committed to something, or it can just fuck right off, I’m not doing that. I’m paralyzed by so many options and new things to try, that I just shut down and stay indoors alone. Procrastinate like a mother fucker and then stress out to get the things I need completed, completed because it’s going to get me in trouble for being late.

The extreme highs of how great your life is, how things are looking up and how accomplished you feel, only a few days later to feel like a failure, there’s no meaning to life and the thought of life getting better isn’t going to happen, even though you know you’re just going through a swing and it’ll go back up.

Lastly, the million things that go through my mind when laying down at night for bed. I have all the greatest ideas and motivation for tomorrow to make major life changes, starting tomorrow. Well, I stay up too late motivating myself, wake up half assed dead to the world and do none of the things. Sucks man

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u/lMurv Dec 02 '21
  1. Hypersensitivity For example Labels in closes HAS to be removed immediately! Also Heat bothers me extremely.

  2. Drifting off way too often... I especially hate this when I drift off while my wife tells me something that is important to her... she gets mad at me... I get mad at me... fun times

BUT I love the fact that I'm always bursting with energy and hardly get tired.

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u/inconspicuous_spidey Dec 02 '21

the drifting off thing was the worst. I learned more overall in in person classes but preferred online reading based classes because I could get through it faster without drifting off. I wound up learning more in person because I had to take notes even on things the professor was repeating for the 1000th time. If I was not writing I was in la-la land. One weird thing about me is I don't really have a problem focusing when reading, but since im focusing wheile reading, i'm not gonna write. I tend to learn more when I write stuff down.

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u/throwingplaydoh Dec 02 '21

Hey, can you "hear" electricity? Like a light or when the TV is on but on mute?

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u/timetobeatthekids Dec 02 '21

That's a pretty normal thing, unrelated to ADHD. Many young folk have hearing in that range but it'll generally fade with age.

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u/lMurv Dec 02 '21

yeah but with ADHD its super hard to block those noises out. they are constantly super present for a lot of affected people

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u/[deleted] Dec 02 '21

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u/lMurv Dec 02 '21

i have a motion sensor light outside. but thats not the worst part: it starts blinking for literally A MINUTE with increasing speed before shutting off. Everytime it turns on. A minute. and i have a huge glass wall next to the front door so it lights up the whole house while blinking.

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u/The_eyes_are_blind Dec 02 '21

Talking too fast and jumping from subject to subject in matter of minutes. Getting mad about dumb things and not letting it go (i.e. something as small, as someone eating their food with their hands or making an annoying noise). Also, having diarrhea of the mouth, like sometimes saying things out loud that should have been kept in, or interrupting people constantly. Lastly, getting bored easily. It was a miracle I got though high school and college without people or myself noticing I had ADD until I got tested as an older adult, because my doctor suspected it, when having a conversation with him.

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u/bangersnmash13 Dec 02 '21

"Hobby collecting"

I'll get into hobbies, go gung-ho buying things related to that hobby, only to get bored and move onto a new hobby in a few weeks. Rinse/repeat

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u/rach_jeffries Dec 02 '21

I have a "Bin of Shame" where I toss my hobby projects that I might like to get back to and finish one day. Guess my dad's not gonna get that cross-stitched car I started years ago, since he's been dead for 10. On the bright side, I currently own $400 of India Ink markers purchased over the course of the summer that I haven't touched since October.

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u/choirleader Dec 02 '21

I bought a loom.

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u/rach_jeffries Dec 02 '21

I'm so sorry :)

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u/sassygiraffy Dec 02 '21

I feel this. I’ve learned to accept it- now when people ask what my hobbies are I just say “trying new things” or something like that!

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u/NotYetASerialKiller Dec 02 '21

Yep, my wallet hurts

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u/Benjaminbuttcrack Dec 02 '21

Needing to get work done but constantly finding myself far away from it. Like I concentrate for 10 minutes, then something in my work reminds me of that time we went and played ding dong ditch, "where did the word "ditch" come from?", then a blur, then i realize while I'm outside checking my oil that i should be inside getting my work done.

Also self medicating. Drinking caffeine because it stimulates me and helps me concentrate and get things done faster, when i should probably be on Adderall but I'm scared of what it can do to my heart. Drinking and smoking weed heavy because i thought they were miracle potions that turned me into a social butterfly, but they made me lose all control and i really should have been taking anxiety medication.

Hyper focusing on things that stimulate me and forgetting what time it is as hours go by and i should have left 10 minutes ago.

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u/inchoatentropy Dec 02 '21

If you’re scared of the effects on your heart, there’s a solution - ask a doctor. I literally talked to my cardiologist about my extensive past with ADHD medication use because I had the same concern. He said I was fine.

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u/Stitchess__ Dec 02 '21

Uh like everything. I know a lot of people love to self diagnose and say they have ADD or ADHD, but those people also love romanticizing it. While ADHD (what I have) isn’t terrible. It’s not that amazing.

So, for myself. I’m either hyper fixated on something, or I have zero motivation to do something. And that fixation can be amazing for getting work done. But if someone breaks my concentration, it’s gone, and is not coming back.

I get distracted very easy, and it’s not like “so I was walking to the store OMG A duck iTS SO CUTESE” no, we aren’t dogs. It’s like, you can’t tell a fucking story for the life of you without taking a million different paths to get there.

If I don’t talk too much I talk way too little.

My energy is either 100 or 0. It comes as easily as it goes.

The mental illnesses that stem from it. With ADHD can come a whole bunch of other mental illnesses. And I was soooo lucky to get a few of those.

Constantly. CONSTANTLY. Forgetting. Like. Not just simple things. But everything. It’s like wtf. It’s so inconvenient. Makes me look and feel like a dumbass.

There’s lots more but I need to actually do school work that’s due tmrw (I have 2 assignments rip) and get my head off this desk, the person behind me might kill me if I don’t stop tapping as-well (Doing an ADHD thing rn lmao)

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u/garlicdjango Dec 02 '21

. I know a lot of people love to self diagnose and say they have ADD or ADHD, but those people also love romanticizing it

this shit makes me want to fucking SCREAM.

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u/Cazzah Dec 03 '21

There's a reason that r/ADHD has the controversial policy of banning any talk about ADHD like it's a "superpower" or just a "special adaptation" or "it wouldn't be a problem if it wasn't for late stage capitalism".

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u/hoopercuber Dec 03 '21 edited Dec 03 '21

There was someone that made a post about how they wouldn’t want a cure to adhd even if there was one and it really made me think about why would anyone that actually struggles with adhd symptoms want to NOT to fix those issues. They said adhd contributes to their personality and that doesn’t sit right with me because there’s so much romanticizing it when it’s clearly a disorder that makes life objectively harder

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u/Cazzah Dec 03 '21

Ah yes, the "personality" of

- Failing to meet promises to friends and family

- Never being able to pursue medium to long term projects, just playing video games, browsing internet, reading etc all day

- Accidentally offending or annoying people

- Making avoidable mistakes in the workplace

- Getting super upset when receiving criticism, commands, or rescheduling

- Inability to manage basic chores and domestic tasks

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u/Lugex Dec 02 '21

What do you forget? This one I get the least. I do not have ADD or ADHD and I never forget something in the sense of my keys. I do not even understand how you would forget them. You need them everyday.

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u/GdeGraafd Dec 02 '21

I want to get tested for adhd soon, I don't know if I have it or not yet so maybe what I say isn't all that reliable but for me it's like;

Holding a pencil, putting the pencil down on my desk, " God damn, where did that pencil go? I was Holding it 2 minutes ago...Did I drop it?" Proceeds to search the whole room for the pencil. End up cleaning up half the room while looking for the pencil. Half way through cleaning my room a thought pops up in my mind "Wasn't I looking for something? What was it again? Did I loose something? Last week I also lost something, what was that again? I found it in the cabinet then, maybe I should look there now. Wow there's a lot of stuff in this cabinet, oh look a toy from when I was a kid, let's see if it still works" 2 hours later "Wait, what was I actually doing? Oh right I was cleaning my room" and I never search for the pencil again

Or

Thinking to myself on repeat "Alright I'm going to tell my sister her cake was delicious when I see her" -10 minutes later- "Hey sis, your cake was really, you know.... what's the word? Uhm it's not tasty but something else... I know this word, I was just thinking it... gosh why can't I remember. Its like I really liked it, how do you say that again?? You know what I mean right?" With the most basic words that I use almost every day.

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u/Stitchess__ Dec 02 '21

This. This. ThIS IS exactly it

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u/GdeGraafd Dec 02 '21

The worst is when I'm doing something, like crocheting for example, and suddenly I don't remember how to crochet anymore. While I've just been doing it for 2 hours or so, its like I 'wake up' and realise I don't know how to move forward from there on, it feels really weird and it takes a few minutes to recollect myself and remember how to do it again.

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u/[deleted] Dec 02 '21

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u/PitchforkJoe Dec 02 '21

I'm noticably worse at my job than I otherwise would be

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u/_SeductiveWalrus Dec 02 '21

Dopamine deficiency. No matter what impulsive shit you do, you're always just one drop short of a full tank.

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u/radioamericaa Dec 02 '21

I just want my dumb brain to feed me some good brain juice every now and then, and it simply refuses.

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u/Tchrspest Dec 02 '21

Please, brain, for fuck's sake. If you give me the good brain juice, you'll also enjoy it. We both win. Give me the juice.

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u/throwingplaydoh Dec 02 '21

Ugh....chasing the dopamine is so fucking expensive too.

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u/NotYetASerialKiller Dec 02 '21

Can relate here. I bought 2 3D printers thinking about how excited it would be and how much I would use them. Then never used them

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u/throwingplaydoh Dec 02 '21

....I also purchased a 3d printer, a really nice one too. I used to for a month, and haven't used it since.

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u/Sonorosiano123 Dec 02 '21

Being an aspiring writer with ADHD is a hell on Earth.

"I'm five chapters into this story... fuck it, let's start another one!!!!"

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u/disoriented_compass Dec 02 '21

I started writing a story, got the prologue done, started a different story, got the prologue done and half of chapter one; rinse and repeat 5 more times, aaaaand I've stopped writing 2-3 years ago

I thought this was something everyone went through, and that authors had some secret magic trick to unblocking writer's block (which they might)

Anyway, idh adhd so idk why I'm here

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u/bluejester12 Dec 02 '21

There, I wrote half a page. What's on YouTube?

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u/ItStillIsntLupus Dec 02 '21

Procrastinating. I tell myself all the time “yeah, I’m going to get all my homework done early!” And then stuff happens and I don’t finish it until the day before

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u/atworking Dec 02 '21

This is actually a method of excitement seeking according to a therapist I saw. Procrastination is very common in people with ADD. Explains my school time perfectly.

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u/tits_the_artist Dec 02 '21

Hyper fixation and lack of impulse control is a big one for me.

Managing deadlines is bad. Thank God I have a job suited to having ADHD.

School is damn near impossible. Knowing you need to do something, and even wanting to be able to do it, but for some reason being completely incapable of actually sitting down and doing is definitely the worst feeling.

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u/some_random_noob Dec 02 '21

Knowing you need to do something, and even wanting to be able to do it, but for some reason being completely incapable of actually sitting down and doing is definitely the worst feeling.

This is my life outside the like 5-7 hours my meds last each day, its so horribly frustrating.

On a side note I got a talking to at work because and I quote "hes a problem solver". When anything needs to be fixed or someone has an issue I always go and resolve it, even if it means not doing my job all day. I know I should be doing my work but someone put a problem in front of me and I cant not solve it.

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u/placiosexuality Dec 02 '21

Have you tried adjusting your medication dosage? 5-7 hours is way too short and a sign you may need a higher dose (at least with stimulants). Everyone needs theirs adjusted to them, after all. You’ll know if a dose is too high too because it’ll keep you from sleeping.

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u/bangersnmash13 Dec 02 '21

Impulse control is an absolute bitch at times. My latest battle was AirPod Pros. Have absolutely no need for them, but loved the idea of having them for some reason. Kept telling myself no, but tried to keep justifying it with things like "Maybe It'll force me to workout more" (it hasn't) or "Maybe I can listen to some music at work to help focus" (I haven't). Then I justified it because they were on sale. I've used them twice in the last month.

Now the battle is with a new guitar. Absolutely nothing wrong with my current guitar, and it's actually a very nice guitar too. But it's in my head now it probably won't go away. My wife said "Let's wait till the new year" So you better believe that Jan 2nd I'll be begging her to buy it.

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u/Born-Cress8152 Dec 02 '21

Telling myself to focus on the conversation but i end up getting so distracted by me telling myself to focus on the conversation that i simply end up not knowing what's happening anymore

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u/jellybeansHD Dec 02 '21

Not really a problem but something that I do is that I can somehow procrastinate 80% of the day but get all my homework in on time

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u/EpicWan Dec 02 '21

Yup, and I hate it so much because all that time wasted procrastinating could have been spent doing something I want to do instead of just sitting on my phone.

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u/_someotherguynotme_ Dec 02 '21

Starting a task and completing a task. Everything in between is gravy. The other challenge is remembering what you commit to do. Add those together and go!

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u/thatoneguy401 Dec 02 '21

Something that I really hate about it is sensory issues. Usually it doesnt bother me too much, but it could be the smallest pain/discomfort that is the worst

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u/rach_jeffries Dec 02 '21

Tags in clothes? Nope. Clothes too tight? Nope. Clothes too loose? Nope. Shower curtain touching me in the shower? Nope. Wore the wrong socks shopping? Every time.

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u/_crowe-_ Dec 02 '21

For me it’s the little bump at the end of certain pairs of socks. I’ll literally throw away a pair if I put them on and feel that bump of cloth

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u/throwingplaydoh Dec 02 '21 edited Dec 02 '21 Helpful

Ha...

Decision paralysis

Rejection sensitivity

Texture sensitivity (clothing, food)

Hyperfocus (people, food, interests, but I don't "pick")

Procrastination

Can only make one "plan" per day, and until then I wait for the thing to happen, because if I get distracted with anything I am sure to miss the appointment

Increased hypervigilance during a crisis, then prolonged burnout

Makes depression and anxiety much worse

The "normal" world is not built for people with ADHD, and people unintentionally make us feel guilt for not going along with the crowd. Planners? Ha! "Just work harder"? Oh! Why didn't I think of that!?

Edit: my most recent hyperfocus this past summer was learning all I could about ADHD, and it's also lead me to believe I may be on the ASD spectrum as well. I've learned that if you're looking for a diagnosis, do an assessment online and bring it to your doctor appointment.

Edit 2: took a link down and included different ones

Free tests:

https://www.psycom.net/adhd-test

https://psychcentral.com/quizzes/adhd-quiz#12

https://www.adhdadulthood.com/adhd-test (not sure if this one has you include an email or not)

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u/ViziDoodle Dec 02 '21

The thing about "just use a planner!", is that I forget about the planner too

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u/The_Bat_Voice Dec 02 '21

When I went to try and get officially diagnosed my doctor handed me a sheet and said take 2 weeks and fill this out and rate your day to day AND get your partner to fill one for you at the same time. Doctor, you know what I'm asking for? You are handing homework to someone with ADHD? You know what ADHD is right? If I fail to bring this back or to even schedule a follow up appointment that should be proof enough. Long story short, I never filled it out, lost the paperwork, and haven't been to the doctors since, it was 3 years ago.

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u/ProphetOfMrMeeseeks Dec 02 '21

weird, my doctor made me sit in front of a computer for hours listening to a beeping sound and having to push a button each time i heard it. i had to do this for multiple days through multiple weeks. I was really young, probably around 8 or 9 but yeah then he diagnosed me.

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u/[deleted] Dec 02 '21

I have never successfully kept a planner or even a grocery list. If I don’t forget it- I’ll disregard it snd get a bunch of random things

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u/this_is_awkward_912 Dec 02 '21

I pretend I’ll use a planner all the time. Bought an expensive one with special pens that are just for the planner and tons of stickers. I used it for maybe 5 weeks (not consistently). It sits in my backpack unused and unloved now.

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u/Zyphin Dec 02 '21

Texture sensitivity is a big one for me. Honestly just hate being touched in general so if I can hug you we have reached a big friendship threshold. Also I can't stand being barefoot. It's like every bit of dust and dirt feels like a pin

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u/snakeoil-huckster Dec 02 '21

Rejection sensitivity is my biggest issue and I never knew it had a name.

I feel like I am constantly in trouble and everyone hates me.

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u/throwingplaydoh Dec 02 '21

I probably should have used the term rejection sensitivity dysphoria, sometimes I don't always have trouble with it, but like you said I've also felt like I'm in trouble for everything: https://www.webmd.com/add-adhd/rejection-sensitive-dysphoria

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u/CharlieTuna_ Dec 02 '21

Holy hell that hyper vigilance during a crisis. I’ve been nearly every company’s 911. Is everyone running around like chickens with their heads cut off? Let me take over and I’ll direct everyone to systematically put out every fire until everything is under control again. Followed by the burnout of tracking dozens of issues and people minute by minute for god knows how long. It’s annoying to be known as the best person to have during a crisis

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u/radioamericaa Dec 02 '21

All of this described my life. I’m just starting adderall again, I hope it helps.

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u/ssi-ruuk Dec 02 '21

dyspraxic not ADHD or ADD but texture sensitivity is so horrible. silk is too soft. some cottons are too rough. some really rough things aren't too rough. but if its inbetween really rough and not that rough it will make me feel sick. i cant have really smooth skin because it distracts me. if its too dry that will also really bother me. fine objects that i can sift through my fingers. yeah makes me uncomfortable too. certain food textures? yeah feel ill with them.

also i get the same with planners. they just don't work for me. things like cleaning my room. i need to "plan" for that in advance and i often forget.

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u/Pokabrows Dec 02 '21

I get absolutely obsessed with things. They're all I think about every waking hour. It kinda sucks being so obsessed with one thing I can't enjoy anything else.

But the worst is between obsessions. Between obsessions I fall into a depression because nothing provides me enough dopamine. Nothing interests me. I'm bored. I'm basically just waiting until I find something else to obsess over.

Over the years I've learned how to deal with this a little bit better. For example exercise is really good for me between obsessions and help me not fall as deeply into that depression. But it still isn't an enjoyable experience.

Also it is expensive switching hobbies so often. At this point I seem to cycle between them though so I keep the stuff and just dig it out when it comes back around.

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u/RolyPoly1320 Dec 02 '21

Me: "I'm going to be ultra productive today and finish tasks x, y, and z."

My Brain: "The hell you are. You'll Google who the president of Zimbabwe was in 1873 then go off on a learning tangent about the geopolitical issues that lead up to WWI and you'll like it."

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u/FlingaNFZ Dec 02 '21 edited Dec 02 '21

I have ADD and Aspergers. I work full time as a delivery driver and its extremely exhausing I just wanna get fired so I can get welfare. Im trying to find a new job but interviews is literally my worst nightmare. Im terrible at talking about myself.

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u/GingerbreadTank Dec 02 '21

Stay strong, fellow ADHD person believes in you. You can do it.

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u/ProfessionalTop9210 Dec 02 '21

Leaving a conversation and thinking,

Fuck I talked wayyy too much. They probably think I’m an idiot. Ugh I wish I just stayed quiet.

And even if you realize it during the conversation you continue talking because you want to share all the cool things you know about a topic because you wasted an absurd amount of time fixating on it.

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u/sovngardes Dec 02 '21

The biggest one for me is sleep. I cannot get my mind to be quiet long enough to fall asleep when I need to (i.e. having to sleep for work the next day) and as a result, I'm tired all the fucking time. When I was medicated, it was such a game changer, I couldn't believe it.

The other big one I find is focusing on tasks that don't have a dopamine pay off. Mundane stuff like schoolwork or even basic chores that need to be done have no reward payoff to me, so I'll push them off or have to force myself into doing them somehow.

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u/FullaLead Dec 02 '21

My wife will go lay down and just sleep. I can't even try, if I lay down my brain just keeps going. Instead I'm up till 3am every night doing things till I'm nodding off and go pass out.

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u/boyboss420 Dec 02 '21

Executive dysfunction kicks my ass, I can barely get myself to do my homework and when I do do it half the time I don’t get it because I couldn’t get myself to pay attention in class. It’s a vicious cycle

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u/pinkyhc Dec 02 '21 edited Dec 02 '21

I hyper focus on intrusive thoughts about social situations from my past, a lot. It contributes to my social anxiety, and I'll often go down a shame spiral before realizing that it's fine and no one else remembers it. I also have to remind myself that the thought that everyone hates me is also just social anxiety, and rejection dysphoria.

I also struggle with inertia. I'll walk past the same mess fifteen times and say 'hey I'll clean that up after dinner, before bed, tomorrow morning, after work, maybe the weekend?', until I realize how stupid that is and take the two minutes to hang up the jackets that are hanging off a chair. Very annoying. I am annoyed with myself constantly.

Edit; also excessive comma use which is what this edit corrected.

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u/rach_jeffries Dec 02 '21

Living out of a laundry basket because it's just too hard to put them away after folding, washing, drying and folding? Haven't taken two of my meds for two days because I need to call the pharmacy? And then, I just snap out of it, get a bunch of shit down, feel pretty proud of myself, then 6 months later, here I am again....Inertia is a bitch.

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u/pinkyhc Dec 02 '21

This is so relatable I laughed out loud. I'll wash the clothes, dry the clothes, switch the load over, no problem. But if you want it folded and put away it's gonna be 5-10 business days, what do you mean that's a problem, what is this, Buckingham Palace? Too good to wear floor pile clothes? Scared the pile will consume you and turn you into mismatched patterned socks (tbh, fair)?

We plan to buy a house with a large laundry room so we can convert it into a closet for my partner and I. I think having all the clothing and clothing appliances with adequate storage in the same place may help keep us organized.

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u/ConradSchu Dec 02 '21

I absolutely could not concentrate or pay attention in school. So, being in the 80s, I got put on Ritalin. Which absolutely helped but I suffered from bad side effects. I had extreme paranoid. I was in elementary and thought my phone was bugged. I thought cameras were set up around my house monitoring my TV watching habits. I felt like everyone was watching my every move non stop. And I delt with it from age 8 to 18. It really messed up a large portion of my childhood.

But the Ritalin wore off at night. When it was time for homework and studying. So I struggled bad to get stuff done at home. I didn't know why until I got older so it never occurred to me to do that stuff when I got home.

I'm 41 now, and though I still have it, it's not as bad as it once was. No idea why. I guess the fact I'm not in a classroom everyday helps a lot. I can tolerate a day or two of classroom type training etc, but the longer it goes on, the worse the ADD gets again

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u/rach_jeffries Dec 02 '21

I was diagnosed so late in my life (53) that I've had multiple jobs that I think I could have been successful in with a little medication. Last effort was teaching. Being in the classroom with kids is GREAT! Grading, data, meetings, parents, updating the gradebook, remembering what I was going to teach that day, going off on a tangent and trying to remember to write it down to teach the next day. I forgot to teach pronouns to an entire class of 9th graders. I miss the kids, but the rest was going to kill me.

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u/beaslei Dec 02 '21

Not getting projects done on time and being hypersensitive to criticism.

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u/gtm_84 Dec 02 '21

Paying attention to something I don't care about for more than 15 minutes

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u/acompletemoron Dec 02 '21

Do you get that kinda, I don’t know, buzz feeling? Like it’s almost physically difficult to keep doing something?

That’s what it feels like for me when I’m uninterested in something but I KNOW I have to do it.

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u/observendespise Dec 02 '21

Structure (keeping my place clean, getting to appointments on time, routines, planning). Lack of motivation and inability to follow through on projects that takes time, repetition or focus. Constantly compensating for dopamine deficiency by never being able to sit still, seeking rushes though sex, shopping, risky behaviors etc. Inability to focus on things like conversations or studies. Stress and low energy. Horrible short term memory.

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u/warrantyvoiderer Dec 02 '21

I can't ever finish a project I start, with one exception, working on my car.

I have about 30 small to medium projects that I have started that are all abandoned because one tiny thing comes up that delays my progress and I immediately forget about the whole damn project and move on to something new.

The only reason I follow through with my car is because it's my only car and I need it to get to work. That doesn't mean I don't put off more important repairs for dumb creature comforts that in no way effect the functionality of my car.

When I'm at work the same thing happens when I'm multitasking. I'll just randomly stop working on something and go do something else without even noticing.

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u/an_ineffable_plan Dec 02 '21

I can hardly ever finish anything I start. And god I start so many things.

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u/throwaway1847372748 Dec 02 '21

i can’t keep a straight conversation without getting into side stories i can’t remember shit really bad at keeping a schedule and sticking to it

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u/KippyKappy21 Dec 02 '21
  • Awareness. One minute my husband is stopping me before walking into a busy street, the next I'm hunched over the vent at home using a paint brush to get the dust off of it. I'm either not aware of anything or too aware of one thing.
  • Brain Bees (or Brain Aspids for you Hollow Knigh fans). It literally feels like my brain is buzzing. When it buzzes just right, I can focus. But when the bees are angry, I want to scream.
  • Literally everything is a distraction. I want to do a thing, I set up my environment to try to do the thing, I sit down to do the thing. But my brain goes 'nah, I want to do literally anything else'.
  • Clothes shopping. Some clothes and fabrics I won't even touch because of how they make me feel. Last time I wore tights, I wanted to claw my legs off.
  • Rambling and tangents. I start talking about one thing, then it leads to another and another and soon I have to retrack back to my original point.
  • Mental fatigue and burn out. If I don't take a brain break during the day, I have a harder time functioning in the evening.
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u/warriorofinternets Dec 02 '21

I work from home now and it’s getting increasingly difficult to stay on task and keep my attention on the job I need to do, far too much time spent on Reddit or doing other things around the house.

Which reminds me I need to chop up some firewood right now.

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u/PottyPengi Dec 02 '21

Forbidden ADHD/Autism combo here. I have a thought process of "We were talking about motocycles, which make noises like bees, so now we're talking about bees, and how they're critically endangered, hey you know what else is endangered? axolotls" and it legit confuses me how other people somehow don't think about things in this streamlined process

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u/rhaphi-draws Dec 02 '21

Late but I'd like to express it.

Learning that my entire childhood and most of my adulthood were substantially more difficult than it needed to be.

It was a relief to see what medication could do for me, but also heart-wrenching knowing how much I've struggled, failed, and had to adjust my life for these failures could be attributed to my folks just never even asking if I did have anything.

My biggest problem by far, isn't even the disorder, but the failure to respond to it my whole life. I couldn't understand why I could read a page of a book but not internalize any of it. Why studying and flash cards didn't work. Why I would be so interested in something and then immediately lose interest in it for months after. Why I always had to fidget with something in the car on a trip, or bounce my leg, or just rummage through a friend's closet when we were kids because ...reasons?

Now that I'm aware, even if I don't have medication I can be consciously thinking about it and still make some better choices that help me.

But yeah, by far, the biggest problem was not even knowing.

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u/DungeonsAndScouts Dec 02 '21

Not one of my biggest problems but a problem I don't see a lot. Not getting as high as neurotypical people. If I smoke a joint my friends are really high for 2 hours. I peak within half an hour and am almost sober(well mostly mentally, still wouldnt drive!) After an hour.

I also feel like I'm often way clearer even when I'm really high.

Also fuck you brain and let me do my hobbies instead of watching YouTube videos all evening.

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u/TarHeelDead414 Dec 02 '21

I’m the opposite. Smoking makes my ADD way worse and I can barely hold a conversation with friends while high because my mind just goes off on sidetracks and then I forget what we were even talking about within 3 minutes

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u/DungeonsAndScouts Dec 02 '21

I have this when I go to sleep! I get headlocked and just keep thinking over stuff.

Only upside is that I'm not depended on weed for sleep because it makes it worse

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u/Pokabrows Dec 02 '21

Haven't got high but yeah meds work weird on me. I'm super sensitive to some like the laughing gas at the dentist. Coffee just sort makes me super chill.

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u/Mucycle Dec 02 '21

Forgetting words for things, describing that thing in a physical hand motion or asking for the word I'm thinking of like Pictionary, and then getting frustrated cause you want to know the word, but the person you're talking to isn't giving you the right word.

This is what I call: Brainfart Pictionary

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u/amberdowny Dec 02 '21

Me to my boss: I did the thingy! Makes vague hand gestures

My boss: You did what now?

Every time.

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u/Alcoraiden Dec 02 '21

Disorganization. My house is a wreck, no matter how hard I try. I forget about tasks even if I keep to-do lists, because eventually the computer will have to restart to update or something and I will lose the list in my Documents folder. I can't finish projects because I have no sense of timeline for them. In general, my life is chaos.

Also no desire to finish a project once the "interesting" part is done. Final details are agony. I fuck up a lot of things by cutting corners because I'm just so frustrated having to finish the thing.

Being unable to see my mistakes. I can read over errors in my work a thousand times and just literally not see them.

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u/SaintBenadikt Dec 02 '21

Remembering to refill my Adderall when I get really busy and forgot to refill it. Trying to remember to get the pills that help you to remember things.

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u/canned_paint Dec 02 '21

I'm sure this will get buried but,

I wouldn't say that I have "extreme" ADHD, but as a kid, I always thought the constant brain fog and disassociation would wear off as I got older and more self-aware. Nope, 22 and about to get married to the love of my life, still find myself struggling to be mentally in the moment when we are together. It's like you have to try 10x as hard to be present in the moment at times..

That and the legal meth I've been prescribed since I was 10.

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u/UncreativePieceOf Dec 02 '21

My sence of time, time management, forgetfulness having really high expectations for myself and the way people treat me.

I was always missing the first lectures and it made me feel worthless. I became so depressed I wanted to commit suicide, I even planned it out and was about to get some alcohol to make it easier. But I cut my hair during my mental breakdown and it calmed me down.

I'm dropping out of uni and the only reason why it doesn't make me suicidal anymore is that I learned I don't need to have a degree to work as a tutor.

But it becomes a huge issue when I have an appointment I forget about because I don't perceive time the way regular people do.

What makes my life truly hard are the people who don't understand my condition. I have to lie to my own family because they don't understand that I phisically cannot function the way they do. I just began getting treated and have yet to learn how to function properly.

Someone just called me lazy and childish under a post I made about my struggles. It buffles me how this person decided that saying that to someone who was about to commit suicide was a good idea. He killed the last drops of hope I had. If it wasn't for the "can I become a tutor without a degree" google search I'd be dead..

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u/Anden-Levonecht Dec 02 '21

Constantly needing to do something

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u/ArconVoid Dec 02 '21

I have a very difficult time focusing and trying to concentrate. I also tend to blank out very frequently. I used to take medication for a little bit of middle school and some of high school. The medication would make me very depressed whenever I took it, so I just eventually stopped. Even though I'm living an adult life now, I still struggle with it, but I've been able to control to some extent; not all the way

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u/Samiautumn Dec 02 '21

This thread is making me wonder if I have ADD or ADHD.

A lot of these comments are describing my everyday struggles perfectly.

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